Chapter 13:
“Well … if it isn’t Fox Mulder …” complained Brian, sarcastically and he sighed audibly.
“What the …”
The visitor looked passed Brian into the living area and could clearly see Justin standing in the middle of the room. He then turned his attention back to the man who’d opened the door to him.
“What the hell is he doing here?”
“Why wasn’t I told?” demanded the man, ignoring Brian’s offhand greeting.
“Funny … I asked myself exactly the same questions,” came Brian’s retort as he let his visitor in.
Brian had opened the door to a man he hadn’t seen for over five years; the same man in fact, that had met with Brian in the loft and had been present the last time Brian had spoken to Justin on his cell, the night before his ‘death’. The man who had helped organize his ‘disappearance’.
“Then he obviously knows?”
“Obviously,” and Brian rolled his eyes up to the heavens as he walked passed the man and went to stand beside Justin, who was frowning with confusion.
“Justin … this is Special Agent McLean,” introduced Brian, in explanation, having immediately recognized the man.
“FBI?” asked Justin and the man in question nodded.
“Between you and the Marshall’s Service … I’m surprised anyone knows where I still live,” stated Brian cynically, and in reference to the lack of communication and the Agent shrugged.
“Well, I had no reason to contact you … until now,” came the reply.
“At least I didn‘t think I had,” and he frowned.
“How did you two get together?”
“You were told you never to have contact with anyone from Pittsburgh,” stated Agent McLean, accusingly.
“It isn’t Brian’s fault … it was just … coincidence … that I ended up here,” Justin informed him.
“I got a job teaching at the same school ...”
“I’m more interested in what brings you here now,” cut in Brian and McLean nodded.
“Stockwell …”
Brian sank down onto the sofa and closed his eyes at the mention of the man’s name. Surely not. Not after all this time. But it‘s what he feared the moment he opened the door. Justin sat down beside him and they both waited nervously for the Agent to continue.
“They’re ready to go to trial.”
“What’s the point?”
“He’s already doing time,” stated Justin in exasperation, with Brian seemingly unable to speak right now.
“It isn’t just Stockwell they’re after,” the Agent informed them. “It’s the links he has to the crime bosses they’re interested in.”
“So?” asked Brian, finding his voice. But he realized he probably already knew where this was heading.
“You’re needed back in Pittsburgh.”
“Proceedings will start after the Christmas recess … they want plenty of time to go over everything.”
“And the best way to do that is to have you back there … the sooner the better.”
Brian nodded. He knew there was no point in refusing: they could always subpoena him to appear in court if necessary.
“Will it be a closed hearing? Will I be anonymous?” asked Brian, clutching at straws and confirming his fears, the man shook his head.
“No … it’ll be open court … and you’ll give evidence as Brian Kinney,” stated McLean. “I tried … but I couldn‘t protect you from that,” he continued, genuinely apologetic.
“You leave in two days time … pack for a long stay.”
“What about school?” asked Brian, getting to his feet. “I do have a job remember? And commitments.”
“We’ll organize a replacement,” promised the Agent.
“You better make that two replacements,” stated Justin, as he stood and both men looked at him. Reaching out, Justin put his hand on Brian’s arm.
“You didn’t think I was gonna let you go back on your own, did you?” Justin told him and the older man placed his hand on top of Justin’s and smiled at him, both of them ignoring the slightly embarrassed look on the Agent’s face at the two men’s obvious display of affection towards each other.
“Fine … I’ll call you with the time of your pick up.”
“I’ll let myself out,” stated the Agent. There was nothing else he could tell Brian at the moment and it looked like the man needed some time to take it all in.
Justin followed McLean and locked the door behind him. He returned to the sofa where Brian’s had sat back down, leaning his head back into the cushions, his eyes shut and his brow furrowed. Sitting beside him and reaching out, Justin’s fingers brought a welcome coolness to Brian’s forehead and the man opened his eyes and tried to smile.
“At least I know the truth,” stated Justin, trying to relieve the uneasiness that Brian obviously felt at having to go back to Pittsburgh and for everyone there to learn the facts about his supposed death. Stockwell’s court case was bound to create a lot of attention: the man‘s connection to Jason Kemp’s murder had never been forgotten, by the gay community, at least.
“Looks like you’ll get to spend Christmas in the Pitts after all,” stated Brian, trying his hardest to smile, but failing miserably.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dreading having to return to his home town, Brian packed slowly. The school was told that both teachers had been called away on matters of extreme importance and in the name of the U.S. government. Not exactly a lie and that explanation prevented too much objection or questioning from Dean Millar, keen to prove himself a patriot, even though he was burning with curiosity.
They’d hung around Brian’s apartment the day after McLean‘s visit, with Brian trying hard not to dwell on what was likely to happen in Pittsburgh and beyond, while Justin drew; the need to put his feelings into art now as strong as it had ever been. He’d tried to quell Brian’s fears, but deep down he knew it was going to be rough.
They’d been called to say they would be picked up at 5:15 the next morning. Justin had packed the last of his things and coming out the bathroom, glanced over at Brian who was standing by his desk, the bottom drawer open. The man didn’t even seem to realize he was there and Justin didn’t recognize what he was holding.
The bottom drawer of Brian’s desk was always locked and Justin hadn’t worried too much to ask about it; he assumed it was the normal stuff you keep locked away, but now, looking around Brian’s arm, Justin reached out to take the photograph album from him. Brian jumped; he hadn’t heard him approach.
Slowly, Justin began to thumb through the pages. Photographs, going back five years; of him in the last few years, but mostly of Gus and including the one that Justin had taken at Thanksgiving that Brian downloaded from his cell. Justin sighed and reaching out, rubbed Brian’s back. He still couldn’t begin to really know how terrible the last five years had been for the older man, he realized.
“I guess … I guess they’re what kept me going,” admitted Brian to Justin and he took the album back from him. Justin watched him close it and wondered who’d taken them and sent them to him. It didn’t really matter, but he was just grateful that someone had.
Locking the desk drawer and taking the album through to the bedroom, where his suitcase lay open on the bed, Brian packed it with his things. Justin didn’t say anything, but Brian knew he understood.
“How long do you think we’ll be gone?” asked Justin eventually as he followed him into the bedroom and Brian shrugged.
“Will you want to come back?” continued the younger man and Brian shrugged again. “I don’t know,” and sighing, he sat down on the edge of the bed, next to his case.
“After I’ve testified as Brian Kinney … I don’t see how I can come back here as Brogan Kennedy,” admitted Brian, trying to hide his confusion, but his bewilderment showed clearly in his face.
“Do you think you’ll have to go into hiding again?” asked Justin, himself now only beginning to grasp the implications. Brian sighed. “If the feds get what they want … I’ll still be a marked man … and by association … so will you.”
“Then they better make arrangements for both of us,” stated Justin and Brian looked up at him.
“I’m not losing you again,” came the whispered explanation and reaching out Brian took Justin’s hand.
Reaching out with his free hand, Justin ran his fingers through Brian’s hair at the temple and the man raised his head to look at him. Leaning down, Justin found Brian’s mouth with his own as Brian pulled the younger man towards him.
“Let’s forget all about it for tonight,” Justin told him, after the kiss and he allowed himself to be pulled onto Brian’s lap; straddling him.
“Would you really come with me?” asked Brian and Justin smiled. “I told you … I’m not losing you again,” confirmed the younger man as he sought Brian’s mouth once more.
Deepening the kiss, Brian pulled Justin in even closer, holding him so tightly that the younger man was forced to come up for air. He could feel Brian’s tension in his grasp and in his kiss and sought to reassure him there was no way on earth he’d allow them to be parted again.
“But this time, it’s my decision to make,” asserted Justin and Brian nodded. He should have let Justin make the decision whether to come with him or not the last time around, admitted Brian to himself and not for the first time. Brian smiled at him. He always did admire Justin when he stated his case or made a decision. He’d watched him grow from boy to man all those years ago and the assured and confident Justin was always quite a turn on.
Reaching past Brian, Justin opened the nightstand drawer and pulled out condoms and lube as Brian pulled off the tee he was wearing before removing Justin’s.
Justin lifted himself off him to allow them both to remove the rest of their clothing. Brian then wriggled further up the bed. Putting the condom on Brian, Justin lubed him before moving forward and straddling Brian once more. Brian grinned. Justin had always liked this position, especially early on in their relationship. Brian guessed it kind of made him think he was ‘on top’. In one way he was, of course and Justin eased himself down onto Brian’s cock.
Closing his eyes, he took a deep breath and moaned with pleasure as he lowered himself further. Brian always liked to think he was in control, but this position allowed Justin to dictate the pace and depth of penetration. Not that he didn’t like Brian all the way inside him. He liked to tease him a little, easing himself down and then up again and letting Brian inside him little by little, for as long as he thought they could both stand it and before Justin needed Brian to fill him completely.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Leaning back and continuing his forward pelvic thrusts, Justin took Brian in fully and opening his eyes, looked down his own body and then up at Brian and watched as the man neared orgasm. Brian’s neck was arched, his eyes tightly shut and his mouth open as he gasped for air. Then, moving ever closer to that beautiful abyss, he opened his eyes and raised his head to look at Justin.
Justin pushed himself forward and reached out for Brian’s hand; entwining their fingers as the other man finally reached and went over the edge: wave after wave of pleasure coursing through him as he came. But with all his might, Justin held off. He still had plans.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Managing to keep his breathing under control, Justin recovered and pushed himself off Brian as the man removed the condom, which he then tied off and dropped into the trash can next to the bed.
“That … wasn’t … half … bad,” breathed Brian, which Justin knew was a compliment indeed and then Brian couldn’t believe his eyes as the younger man produced another condom from amongst the disheveled bedclothes.
“I haven’t finished yet,” declared Justin and the sparkle in those blue eyes told Brian exactly what he was expecting to happen. Brian closed his eyes and rolled his lips into his mouth. He could hardly object, after the enormous pleasure experienced just a few moments ago. But then again, he didn’t want to.
Justin leaned forward and kissed Brian, the smile still on the younger man’s lips as he took Brian by the shoulder: the other man not objecting as Justin rolled him over onto his belly. He’d never admit it of course, but feeling Justin inside him made him feel even closer to the younger man.
Justin wasn’t the first. That had been when he was about 15 and not even legal, but then again, he’d always been an early starter. But Brian had quickly learned how good it felt to be the one on top and in control and how necessary that was in order to lose himself and forget how shitty the rest of his life was at that time by comparison. And later, it was a habit hard to break.
He’d let Nicholas, at a time when he really needed to feel close to someone and in a vain attempt to make himself believe he could actually fall in love with the man. But he hadn’t of course. There was only one man and that was the beautiful blue eyed blond whose body was once more about to become part of his.
Leaning forward again, Justin kissed Brian’s shoulderblade, all the while removing the condom from its foil wrapper. He knew this had never come easy to Brian in the past, relinquishing control, as he saw it. But Justin never viewed it as his way to dominate the other man, but a way to experience with him the pleasures as they shared their bodies and hoped Brian had learned to view the act the same way too.
Justin’s body ached with the built up anticipation as he gently spread Brian’s buttocks and he heard the man’s sharp intake of breath as he leaned forward again to kiss Brian in the small of his back and then trailed his tongue down to the top of the man’s crack. Brian groaned and despite his recent physical activity, felt himself begin to harden against the mattress.
Reaching out, Justin ran his fingers up Brian’s spine and into his hair. The man was still beautiful. He had the longest back that Justin had ever seen and the most beautiful ass to go with it. And he couldn’t help himself.
He’d never actually rimmed Brian before, considering he was satisfied enough that Brian had bottomed once in a while. But the man wasn’t putting up any objections as Justin cupped Brian’s ass cheek in his hand. In fact, he felt Brian tremor with anticipated pleasure under his touch.
With his eyes closed, Brian swallowed as he felt Justin’s hot breath on his skin and the pressure of his hands as his buttocks were spread and he actually found himself bending his leg and bringing up his knee to give Justin greater access.
Brian already knew that Justin had the most incredible mouth and tongue. The many blow jobs he‘d given him had shown him that, but the way he used his tongue this time was different. It was long and wet and hot and it probed. It darted in and out. Licking and tasting him and teasing nerve endings until he thought he would lose his mind. And then Brian felt Justin’s lips on his flesh and finally lost his grip on all reality as he found himself taken somewhere he never knew existed. He’d done this himself of course. His very first night with Justin, Brian had rimmed him seemingly within an inch of his life, by the younger man’s reaction. But in all his years, Brian had never experienced it for himself, until tonight.
Justin knew Brian was about to come again and he didn’t think he could be far off himself and he’d barely started. With a final lick, Justin shifted position, bringing his cock to Brian’s entrance and guiding himself inside.
He felt Brian gasp and clench and then let go as he forced himself to relax. How many times had Brian told Justin to relax that night when he informed him that the pain that went with it was part of the experience? A part of the pleasure that never really went away.
Justin was special back then, Brian knew it, right from the start. How many other virgins would he have treated with the gentleness and respect that he surprisingly found himself according to Justin? And Justin was special now, the way he could bring their bodies together and make Brian feel a part of it and not in any demeaning way. This is what being topped should all be about, Brian realized, somewhere in the mush that was his brain. A joint pleasure, not seeing it as one person being in control of the other, dominating them. The experience was there for them both to enjoy.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Leaning over, Brian kissed him. Justin smiled back at him before turning over and snuggling back into him as sleep took them both over. He hadn’t been able to hold out as long as he wanted, but the enjoyment hadn’t been lessened because of it.
Knowing that Justin was close to coming, Brian had reached around and caught hold of the younger man’s hip, willing him on, pulling him in deeper.
How both men wanted it to always be like this; a connection, physical and emotional. A need for each other greater than ever before, taking them into an uncertain future. But at least this time, they planned to be together.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
They were collected as arranged and all in all, the flight was uneventful. It was still early and, surprisingly, this close to Christmas, pretty quiet and they were able to leave distance between themselves and fellow passengers, allowing them to talk.
Will Reynolds, the U.S. Marshall escorting them, was tall, broad, late thirties, but looked younger and quite attractive. He cut an imposing figure and Brian and Justin couldn’t help looking at each other and sharing a grin. A few years ago and Brian would have taken his chances at nailing him, even though there was a wedding ring on Reynolds' finger.
The man informed them that once they’d arrived in Pittsburgh, they’d be taken to a safe house at an undisclosed address, where the D.A. and anyone else connected to the case against Stockwell would meet with them in the ensuing days. They were still to have no contact with anyone they knew, and this time, these instructions included Justin, much to his initial dismay. How could they expect him not to have any contact with his mom over Christmas?
Having asked the question when the Marshall had moved over a couple of seats to give them a little room, Justin saw Brian look away and suddenly, more than ever, realized just what supporting him like this would mean. If things worked out as they feared, Justin would never have contact with any of his family or friends again.
“Are you sure you can go through with it … disappearing with me … if that’s what it takes?” asked Brian and Justin hesitated, though only momentarily.
“Yes … this time … it’s you and me,” Justin told him and reaching out, he squeezed Brian’s hand in reassurance. He’d made his decision.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
It had been warm when they left San Francisco and it felt freezing in Pittsburgh by comparison and they hadn’t even left the terminal building.
A party of students, also just arriving from out of state, tired but still excited, were gathered by the baggage carousels and Brian, Justin and the Marshall, had to push through them as they made their way to collect their luggage. Surrounded by the young people, that’s when they heard the terrified scream.
Instinctively, the Marshall grabbed for Brian and pushed in front, shielding him with his own body as he began to unholster his gun as a precaution against the unknown and yet unseen threat, and unable in the ensuing melee to make sense of what was happening. Justin, not the Marshall’s first priority, was now a couple of yards in front and separated from them by several of the young people.
The cry of alarm had been the reaction of a teenager to the sudden appearance of a man brandishing a firearm and crouching down by one of the pillars, but who had remained unseen by the Marshall, shielded from view by the youngsters. The screaming escalated as the gunman appeared to take aim and the group of school kids and their teachers began to scatter in terror; many of them not knowing what the threat was, but just following the example being set by their companions as the panic spread.
With the crowd dispersing in all directions, in the confusion, Justin looked around to attempt to make sense of what was going on and to look in desperation for Brian, trying to locate him; his first assumption that this was some sort of terrorist attack.
Brian, whose progress had been abruptly halted and was winded by an accidental elbow in the chest from Reynolds, as the man sought to keep his charge safe, now tried to look past the large form of his bodyguard as the first shot rang out. The would be assassin had quickly fired into the ceiling in an attempt to clear the floor and he then resumed his aim.
Having turned and grabbed Brian by the shoulder, the Marshall had been attempting to push him to the ground and behind the nearest carousel for protection. So far, unable to identify the exact location of the gunman and bearing in mind the number of panicking civilians, he’d been unable to let loose a shot in defense or retaliation and the man took the full force of the second bullet in his right shoulder, sending his own firearm spinning out of his hand and sending him crashing to the floor. The Marshall, shielding Brian, was head and shoulders taller than anyone else and a relatively easy target and had to be taken out first. But unfortunately for the gunman, the man had been partly obscured by some of the young people who didn’t know which way to run, hence the shot to the shoulder instead of the trunk.
The gunman knew exactly who he was looking for and was now preparing for the attempt on Brian, but the man was out of his sight. There was, however, only one place he could be and that was behind the carousel.
Though injured, the Marshall had from somewhere, summoned up all the strength he could muster and had managed to roll behind the carousel, but he and Brian were now pinned down. But not only was the larger man hurt, he was now unarmed, his gun laying out in the middle of the floor.
The gunman had completed his walk across the hall. The school kids and their teachers cowered in groups behind pillars and carousels, too terrified to try and get away. The man knew where Brian and his guard must be. He knew he’d hit the Marshall, but with everyone still scattering he hadn’t seen exactly where the man had managed to take refuge. But there was one carousel left that he hadn’t checked out. The only one left that could provide sufficient cover for whom he sought.
Justin, having failed to spot the gunman’s location in his frantic search for Brian among the fleeing crowd, had hesitated and not sought shelter and now suddenly realized he was standing alone. He turned around as he still searched for Brian, not knowing where the man had been so unceremoniously shoved. Nor did Justin realize that he was now exactly between Brian and his attacker. But then movement out of the corner of Justin’s eye caught his attention and turning, he found himself staring straight into the face of a man with a gun, barely 25 feet away from him.
Justin wasn’t the man’s intended victim, but an opportunity presented itself with which to possibly flush his target out, and cause him extreme pain in the process and this chance could not be ignored. Knowing his time was now limited before security guards descended on the baggage hall, the man took aim at Justin.
There now seemed to be total silence in the hall. The nearest carousel and where Brian was concealed was less than ten feet away from Justin. Ten feet to relative safety, but before he had a chance to move, the man had leveled his gun and Justin knew he’d never make it.
The Marshall had succeeded in pushing Brian behind the carousel before he was hit in the shoulder, knocking the man to the floor and leaving him stunned with the pain and shock of the assault. Still winded and now shaken with the attack on Reynolds, Brian then realized he’d lost track of Justin. Tentatively, he crawled to the edge of the carousel and looked out. To his horror, there stood the younger man, alone and totally unprotected.
The assailant was too far away. Even if the Marshall’s firearm was in reach and he could make a grab for it, Brian knew the chances of him actually being able to hit the gunman in the split second open to him were less than nil. Brian then saw the gunman line up on Justin and the bile rose in his chest.
He hadn’t given up their chance of a life together all those years ago only to risk Justin’s safety after all. Once again, Brian had limited options. There was really only one thing he could do.
Brian got to his feet and stepped out from behind the protection of the baggage carousel. He stared at the man intent on killing him and couldn‘t help thinking he‘d seen him somewhere before.
“It’s me you want … no one else,” Brian called out across the floor of the hall.
At the sound of Brian’s voice, Justin instinctively turned towards him, with a look of sheer horror on his face as he realized what the man’s intentions were.
“NO!”
Brian put out a hand, telling Justin to halt and then he took a step forward.
He knew he was probably, literally, staring death in the face. But if offering himself up meant keeping Justin alive, then that was the price he was more than prepared to pay. And then he remembered. This was the same man he’d seen at Stockwell’s that day. The day this whole thing started. And now was the day it would end.
Brian had tried to keep his voice steady, his tone belying the absolute terror he felt.
“There isn’t any reason for anyone else to get hurt …”
It happened in the blink of an eye. Before Brian had completely finished his sentence, the shot rang out, and the sound it made was still echoing around the hall and almost masked the crack that followed it a split second later.
The bullet caught Brian in the upper arm, tearing through coat, suit jacket, shirt and flesh and sent him spinning. But thankfully, it missed the bone before exiting and embedding itself in the metal of the baggage chute.
The look of shock on the gunman’s face couldn’t be missed as he felt the searing pain in his chest. The impact of the bullet had rocked him on his feet, spoiling his aim before sending him crashing to the floor.
When Brian had gotten to his feet and moved out from behind his hiding place, the Marshall, sweating profusely, had forced himself into a sitting position and then onto his knees and crawled to the other side of the carousel. Peering out, he could see the gunman’s concentration was now totally locked on Brian. He saw the gunman relax slightly and then begin to raise his arm to take aim.
Drawing as much oxygen into his lungs as he could and ignoring the pain in his shoulder, Reynolds hurled himself out into the open and collected his gun. And, with his left hand, had still managed to line up a shot and successfully bring the assassin down, barely in time, before collapsing with exhaustion.
Justin, unable to stand there and do nothing had started towards Brian. If necessary, he would put himself between Brian and the gunman: he couldn’t just stand there and watch the man he loved die. Justin knew what it felt to live without Brian, believing he were dead. He didn’t want to feel that way again.
Moving towards Brian, intent on being his shield, Justin actually felt the bullet that hit Brian, whistle passed him and with horror, saw the man reel back under its impact before he could do anything.
“NO!“
“Jesus Christ … BRIAN!?”
He’d almost reached him and now, Justin quickly knelt beside him. Brian was flat on his back, though gripping his upper right arm. His eyes were wide open and he was gasping for breath and blood from the wound was oozing between his fingers and pooling on the floor.
Brian blinked and then swallowed and took stock. His arm hurt like hell and the relative silence in the hall had now been replaced by a growing cacophony as people started to get to their feet and take in what had happened. Then someone started to cry. But Brian was alive and, as far as he could tell, not seriously hurt.
The pounding of heavy boots could now be heard as the security men made their way through the hall. They’d been attending a suspect car parked illegally outside the main entrance, which was now recognized as obviously a diversion away from the real scene of intended crime.
Brian’s senses began to gradually clear. Justin’s beautiful, but horrified face slowly came into focus as the younger man knelt over him, stroking Brian’s forehead and holding his hand.
“I’m okay, Sunshine,” whispered Brian and Justin momentarily closed his eyes in relief.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“I believe it’s what they call a through and through,” proclaimed Brian, proudly referring to the injury he’d sustained; the bullet having entered and then exiting his body and causing no real or lasting damage on its way. Just hurting like hell.
Brian had been taken to the Emergency Room at Allegheny General and after being checked out and his wound treated and dressed and given painkillers, he was now ready to be discharged and Justin put Brian’s jacket around the man’s shoulders.
Catching hold of the ripped sleeve, Brian examined it. “Shit … my best suit …”
“Still … at least it wasn’t my leather jacket.”
Justin inwardly sighed. If he hadn’t known him better, Justin would have said that Brian was being flippant. But he knew Brian and understood him. Feigning displeasure that his suit was irreparably damaged, instead of worrying that he or Justin were nearly killed, was Brian’s way of handling the seriousness of the situation and Justin could easily overlook the seemingly inappropriate remark, knowing it for what it was.
“You were lucky … I thought I was gonna lose you … again,” Justin told him as Brian turned to face him, the younger man’s complexion even paler than usual with the shock of the attempt on Brian’s life and not forgetting the threat to his own.
“You were gonna give your life … “
“So were you,” whispered Brian, knowing exactly what Justin’s intentions had been and the risk he’d been prepared to take.
Sensing that Justin was barely holding it together; hell, he was barely keeping it together too, Brian raised his good arm and put a finger to Justin’s lips before cupping his chin and leaning down for a kiss, silencing Justin and in an attempt to quell his fears.
After the kiss had run its course, Brian rested his forehead against Justin’s, giving both men time to gather their senses before the younger man eventually pulled back.
“If I still had any doubts about why you did what you did … five years ago … “ Justin stopped and closed his eyes as he shook his head. Brian smiled weakly and sighed as he stroked the younger man‘s cheek. If not before, then finally, had Justin now understood the seriousness of the threat and Brian’s way of dealing with it. And with any remaining trace of doubt disappearing for good, so did any feelings of disappointment or dismay at Brian’s actions, those five years ago.
“I hate to tell you folks … but it isn’t necessarily over yet,” came the commanding voice from the doorway and Brian and Justin both turned to face the man standing there and holding out his identification.
“Special Agent Coulter,” the man announced himself and Brian sank back down on the bed.
“There’s still a lot of time before we go to trial,” stated the FBI man and Brian sighed. That was the truth. This attempt may have failed, but that didn’t mean to say there wouldn’t be others.
Once appraised of the situation, the police had stood guard at Brian’s hospital room door while the local FBI field office was notified of events. Agent Coulter was now in charge of Brian’s security.
“We have to get you to the safe house … there’s extra men outside,” he announced and slowly, Brian got to his feet.
“There’s someone I need to see before we leave,” stated Brian.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The man had been operated on successfully. The bullet was removed from Reynold’s shoulder without complications and he was now in the recovery room. Brian had wanted to state his gratitude personally, but Coulter was eager to get them away from the hospital: the threat was still very real and he wanted Brian and Justin tucked away safely as soon as possible. But from the window Brian mouthed his thank you and he saw Renyolds smile and hold up his hand and then give him the universally recognized ‘thumbs up’.
“We should go,” announced Coulter and now flanked by four FBI agents, Brian and Justin were escorted to the elevator where they made their way to the basement parking lot.
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The house stood in its own grounds with electrically operated gates and a high wall around its perimeter and had CCTV cameras covering every angle. They’d only been there just over 24 hours and already, Brian was stir crazy.
“At least when I went to San Francisco I could go out and do more or less what I wanted,” he complained in exasperation.
It was the morning of Christmas Eve and outside, it looked like snow: a typical Pittsburgh winter‘s day.
“A white Christmas … fucking perfect.” Favoring his injured arm, Brian stood in front of the window and studied the sky. The house was well equipped and they had supplies to last several days. And three FBI agents on the premises at any given time, though the men gave them as much privacy as possible. Not that they really wanted to spend time in Brian and Justin’s company, they considered themselves far too macho for that and Brian thought he could detect a sense of resentment: that the men had to ‘babysit the queers over Christmas‘ instead of spending time with their own families.
“Take no notice,” Justin had told him and Brian sighed. “As long as they do their job … I don’t care how much they hate me,” he told Justin and Brian sank down onto the sofa.
To begin with, there had been sketchy information coming through on the tv news broadcasts concerning the incident at the airport, though speculation had slowly been mounting that it involved the Marshalls’ Service. Brian had given up watching the reports, knowing it was only going to be a matter of time before his presence back in Pittsburgh became common knowledge; Stockwell’s trial would see to that, if it didn’t come out beforehand.
Justin could sense Brian’s frustration and apprehension at being back in Pittsburgh and his nervousness concerning the impending trial. Tomorrow was Christmas Day, though Justin sensed there would be little celebration and then immediately afterwards, they were due to meet with the District Attorney’s office. Or at least that had been the plan.
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It was late morning when the black SUV pulled through the gates and Agent Coulter was let in the front door. He’d been in contact by phone several times already since he’d delivered Brian and Justin, but this was the first time he’d actually returned there since.
“How’s Reynolds?” asked Brian immediately. This had become his first question when talking to the agent and he’d already been told that Reynolds was expected to make a complete recover, much to Brian’s relief. He owed the man his life and so, probably, did Justin and they were both thankful there would be no lasting incapacity.
Coulter smiled. “Good … he’ll be getting out of the hospital any day now,” came the answer and Brian smiled back in relief.
“But an employee’s failed to show two days running at the FBI field office here,” the agent continued and Justin frowned. “Is that how they knew which flight Brian was on?” he asked him and the agent nodded. “Seems like it,” and he turned to Brian.
“Someone screwed up … the notice that came through as soon as the arrangements were made, had you listed as Brian Kinney … not Brogan Kennedy.”
“We think someone had been waiting to see when you re-surfaced ... once we knew the trial was back on again.”
Brian nodded, taking this piece of information in, but then he frowned, wondering why the agent was there. Surely he hadn‘t come out here just to tell him that.
“Has something happened?” Brian asked him, sensing the man’s slight hesitation before stating the real nature of his visit and Coulter took a deep breath.
“Stockwell’s dead,” was the announcement that sent both Brian and Justin reeling.
“What?” came Brian’s shock response and the agent shrugged.
“Prelim’s give it as a heart attack … but there’s still some doubt.”
“But he is dead?” asked Justin, seeking reassurance and the man nodded. “Oh yeah … he‘s dead alright … we‘re just not exactly sure how.”
“There‘s more than one way to make something look like a heart attack,” he continued and in shock, Brian sank heavily down onto the sofa.
“But how? How could that happen?”
“Didn’t he have protection? Wasn’t he in high security?” asked Brian in frustration and Coulter nodded. “Sure … but last night, the bathrooms in the high security wing suddenly backed up and everyone had to be moved.“
“Shortly after … he collapsed.“
“They took him to the hospital wing … but he was pronounced dead at 4:00 this morning.“
“Someone got to him?” asked Justin and again, the agent shrugged. “Your guess is as good as mine … but I’d bet a month’s pay …”
“I guess that since the attempt on Brian failed … whoever had the most to lose decided to go after Stockwell after all.”
“Or …” and Coulter shrugged again. “Or the man simply had a heart attack … with the court case looming over him,” he continued.
“What now?” asked Brian, still trying to come to grips with this latest, startling revelation in the Stockwell saga.
With Justin taking his place on the sofa next to Brian, Coulter sat down in a chair opposite them and shrugged.
“Without Stockwell, there’s no case.”
“What about Brian’s evidence?” asked Justin, still a little confused as to what this would mean for them and Coulter shook his head.
“Even if Brian’s testimony proves that Stockwell had links to organized crime … without the man himself … it means nothing … and with the gunman dead … there‘s no way we can link the attempt on Brian’s life back to anyone in particular … we haven‘t found any evidence yet.”
“All our enquiries indicate that the guy seems to have been working independently in the last few years … selling himself to the highest bidder.”
“Anyhow … I talked to the D.A.’s office before I came over … there’ll be no proceedings … it’s as simple as that.”
“What about me?” asked Brian, trying to work out where he now fitted into all of this.
“You no longer pose a threat to anyone … your evidence doesn’t mean squat,” came the answer.
So … that’s it?” asked Brian. “I’m not needed any more?” he asked him and Coulter shook his head. “No … you’re free to go … and do whatever you want.”
Coulter couldn’t ignore the look of shock on Brian’s face as the man tried to take this all in, but there was more to come.
“There’s something else.”
“Jesus Christ … there’s more?” questioned Justin and Coulter nodded.
“There’ll be a press conference,“ and Coulter looked at his watch. “Round about now,“ he continued.
“With an announcement about Stockwell’s death.”
“We can’t keep it under wraps any longer … his family will want to make an announcement themselves and then make arrangements for his funeral … and there’ll also be a statement about any proceedings being dropped …“
“Another reason why I needed to speak to you first … in person … and give you a heads up.”
“But that’s not all.”
Brian closed his eyes and shook his head. What the hell else could there be?
“The press are swarming all over us for an explanation about what happened at the airport yesterday,” Coulter continued. “Have you seen the news?”
Brian nodded. “Some … but I’ve been trying to avoid it,” came the truthful answer. Brian knew the media would jump on it, but didn’t feel like being reminded of it. Coulter nodded his understanding.
“Well … I’m not sure how long we can keep them from finding out that an essential witness in the case the D.A. was hoping to bring against Stockwell was almost gunned down … in broad daylight … there were far too many witnesses.”
“So I think it’s safe to say you’ll soon be attracting some attention.”
“Great!” groaned Brian and he shook his head in exasperation. This was all happening so damn quickly, he couldn’t begin to get his head around what all this would mean. How was the world going to take the fact that Brian Kinney was back from the dead?
“I’m afraid our job is done,” stated Coulter, as he rose up from the chair, obviously intending to leave, but he hovered, giving Brian a little time to absorb everything and then finally, Brian got to his feet also.
Coulter could see Brian’s difficulty in taking this all in and reaching out, placed his hand on the man’s good shoulder.
“You did the right thing … five years ago … when the threat was real.”
“But it’s over … you can go back to being Brian Kinney again … you don’t need Brogan Kennedy any longer,” he told him and Coulter squeezed Brian’s shoulder.
“You can stay in the house if you want for a few days … while you decide what to do … just let me know when you decide to leave.“
“You have my number … call me … any time, day or night … if you have any concerns …”
“But I’ll be standing the guys down once we‘re sure word is out that there’ll be no trial … but you’re no longer in any danger,” stated Coulter.
“I’ll let myself out,” he smiled at them. “Good luck,” and Coulter held out his hand and shook hands with them both and within a few minutes, the man had gone, leaving Brian and Justin trying to absorb how everything could change in such a short space of time.
“I can’t fucking believe it,” proclaimed Brian, now he and Justin were alone in the room.
Still shocked himself but wanting to reassure Brian, Justin reached out and placed his hand on the man’s uninjured arm. “You heard what he said … you can go back to being Brian Kinney … pick up your life again … do whatever you want,” he told him and then Justin hesitated.
“As long as you still want me, that is,” he queried and Brian managed a smile at him.
“Oh … I do,” he stated quietly before pulling him in for a kiss, and ignoring the pressure of Justin’s body on his still sore arm. That, at least, was one thing Brian was sure about at this moment.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
At 6:00, the agent currently in charge of the security for the house, knocked on the door of the living room and then entered.
“We’re standing down … Coulter’s been in touch … it’s all over the news service that there’ll be no case against Stockwell … the world and his dog pretty much knows now,” the man assured them and within the space of an hour, all their gear had been packed up and taken away, leaving Brian and Justin alone in the house.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
It was Christmas morning. Not that the fact had registered; the man with hazel eyes was waking up as Brian Kinney for the first time in over five years. But what the hell would that now mean, he asked himself.
4:00am. and unable to sleep, Brian had gotten up, and leaving Justin in bed, he put on his robe and made his way, still barefoot, down to the kitchen where he made a pot of strong coffee. He struggled a bit, with his gimp arm, but still several hours from dawn, Brian just put the lights on under the kitchen cupboards and sat at the table as he tried to think.
Could he really pick up where he left off, five years before? And walk back into the lives of Michael or Lindsay, or, more importantly, Gus, his son? And pick up the reins at Kinnetik and Babylon?
What would he say to everyone? How would he explain his decision to leave and expect them to accept him back into their lives as if nothing had happened? Like Justin, would they understand why he’d done what he had or would they not want to know him instead?
Just before 8:00, Justin woke up and found himself alone. He checked the ensuite bathroom, but there was no sign of Brian. The man had been restless most of the night. It wasn’t difficult to understand the confusion Brian was going through right now: wondering who the hell he was supposed to be, all over again.
Justin grabbed his robe and made his way down to the kitchen, where he stood in the doorway for a few moments and watched Brian. The man was staring down into his coffee cup, but it was pretty obvious he wasn’t actually seeing anything. And he didn’t hear as Justin approached, padding across the kitchen floor in bare feet. The first Brian was aware of the younger man’s presence was when he felt Justin’s hand at the back of his neck. Brian looked up and leaning down, Justin kissed him.
“Merry Christmas,” smiled Justin and Brian managed a smile. “Merry Christmas,” came the rather fatigued reply and Brian sighed. “I forgot what day it was … I guess I’m not exactly in the Christmas mood,” and looking over, he caught Justin’s slightly bemused look and raised eyebrow.
“Okay,” conceded Brian. “I guess I never was one for Christmas.” Not with the memories of being hauled off to Church by his mother with his sister, his father always refusing to attend and who was generally three sheets to the wind by late morning. Subsequently, the rest of Christmas Day would be spent in a sullen silence by Joanie, which would eventually be broken when the arguments started and then Claire and Brian would end up hiding in their rooms, hoping Jack wouldn’t come looking for them. Or, precisely, wouldn’t come looking for Brian, the only other male in the household that Jack could take out his frustrations on. Until the time when Brian either managed to escape over to Michael’s or actually got too big for his dad to continue to use him as a punching bag. Some merry Christmases in the Kinney household they were, so no wonder the man never felt like celebrating the event himself.
“Are you okay?” Justin asked him, jerking Brian out of his reverie and Brian shrugged. “I guess … at least we’re both alive.” Justin nodded in agreement. Collecting a cup from the counter and turning off the cupboard lights, he sat down on the chair beside Brian, who stretched out, picked up the coffee pot and poured out Justin’s drink.
“Well … I can’t talk,” commented Justin. “What with school and everything else, I completely forgot it was Christmas too … I mean … I never got a chance to really go shopping and get you a proper present.”
“Like I said … at least we‘re both alive … you’re alive … that‘s all that‘s important,” continued Brian.
“That‘s the best gift I could have,” and the man smiled at him and Justin nodded. “Me too,” came the grateful reply.
Justin took a mouthful of his coffee and then frowned before sliding off the chair and heading for the freezer where he inspected the contents.
“We’ve enough food to last for several days … until we decide what to do.”
“What do you want for our Christmas lunch? We better take something out to defrost,” stated Justin and Brian shook his head.
“If only every decision could be that easy … like what we’re going to eat …”
Straightening up, Justin closed the freezer door and crossed the floor back towards him, and reaching out, affectionately stroked the back of Brian’s neck and ran his hand up through the man‘s hair.
“I know it’s gonna take a while to readjust … but … whatever you decide to do … whoever you decide to be … I’ll still be right here … with you,” Justin reassured him and looking up at him, Brian managed a weak smile.
Brian hadn’t thought about that; the choice about who he could be. Maybe he didn’t need to go back to being Brian Kinney again. He’d surprised himself by actually enjoying teaching, even though it didn’t bring the financial rewards that owning his own business had. It was definitely good to have choices, but with Justin by his side, Brian knew that really, he could do anything he set his mind to and be anyone he wanted to be.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Shaking himself out of his dark mood, Brian helped Justin make breakfast and decide what to take out the freezer before they went back upstairs to shower and dress. Then they exchanged ’Christmas presents’ in the bedroom after all. The sort that don’t need wrapping. Correction, maybe a little wrapping.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A little after 10:30am. and they’d come back downstairs to clear away the breakfast dishes. They managed to resist putting on the TV to see if CNN was still reporting the incident at the airport or conjecturing about the cancellation of the Stockwell trial; they didn’t want to face any of that until they had to.
Justin, now rarely separated from a sketchbook and pencils, was on his way back upstairs to collect them when the doorbell rang. Brian didn’t hear it, he’d just switched on the dishwasher, which held last night’s dirty dinner dishes as well as this morning’s breakfast things and had then poured himself out another cup of coffee and picked up a copy of yesterday’s paper that one of the FBI agents had left behind, which already had a headline on the shooting.
“You have visitors,” came Justin’s voice as he entered the room and positioned himself by the kitchen counter. And before Brian could ask who and turn around to see what Justin was talking about:
“Brian Kinney … you never could do anything quietly … you always have to make a fucking entrance ...”
“But I think even you’ve excelled yourself this time.”
Brian closed his eyes and rolled his lips into his mouth before shaking his head. His stomach flipped, but he couldn’t help grinning to himself. He would never, ever be able to forget that voice.
“You know me, Deb,” shrugged Brian in agreement, as he turned around to face her.
Standing in the doorway, dressed in a thick woollen coat that Joseph would have been proud of, stood Debbie Novotny and alongside her, Carl Horvath. And seeing Brian for the first time in five years, alive and sporting a beard, Debbie gave a little gasp.
She then scowled at him long and hard and Brian waited with a heavy heart for World War III to commence.
“I could fucking kill you myself … for what you put us through,” growled Debbie, but then her face broke into a huge grin and she opened up her arms.
“It is so good to see you, kiddo,” and Debbie’s voice broke as she tried to hold back her tears but failed somewhat.
Hardly able to contain his own emotions, Brian quickly got up from his chair and went to embrace the women who was the closest thing he’d ever had to a mom.
“Ouch … easy,” pleaded Brian, with Debbie’s weight against his injured arm and, realizing he was hurt, Debbie started crying even more and clung to him for several moments before drawing back, eventually registering the unfamiliar feeling against her skin.
Brian’s face had brushed her cheek and Debbie sniffed and blinked and then looked at him for a few moments, before reaching up and stroking Brian’s beard.
“Christ … this actually suits you,” choked Debbie admiringly and Brian managed a chuckle. With everything happening, he hadn’t thought about shaving off the beard and then he saw the tears welling even more in Debbie’s eyes and forgetting his sore arm, Brian drew her back in for another hug and tried to stop her from shaking, conscious that was actually trembling now himself.
Carl: big, broad, solid, dependable, retired police lieutenant Carl Horvath, was also having problems keeping his emotions in check as he surveyed the scene in front of him and was forced to clear his throat. Brian had his eyes closed and then opening them, looked over Debbie’s shoulder at him. Reaching around Debbie, Brian stretched out his uninjured arm.
“Deputydawg … it’s good to see you,” grinned Brian, broadly and stepping forward, Carl returned his grin and accepted the proffered hand.
“Irishwolfhound … likewise,” came the genuinely affectionate reply.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
It was several minutes before Debbie was able to compose herself and break away from Brian‘s hold and then she hugged Justin for all he was worth too. All four of them, standing in the kitchen, sniffed and blew their noses before moving into the living room.
“How much do you know?” asked Brian as Debbie brought in the fresh coffee, after insisting upon making it.
“Well … I knew you were coming in,“ confessed Carl as he sat down on the sofa and he shot a look at Debbie. “And then I got a call last night.”
“I can’t believe he kept it a secret from me … for over five fucking years!” exclaimed Debbie, as she put the pot down on the coffee table, with Justin following on behind with the tray of cups and saucers. “And I end up learning about it on Christmas Day … of all day’s,” continued Debbie shaking her head.
“Every news bulletin has been mentioning a shooting at the airport,” continued Carl. “I have to admit … I did wonder at the time … knowing you were due in.”
“And then came the announcement about Stockwell … and finally … yesterday evening … I got the call to confirm that it was you … but that you were both okay.”
“Looks like the press have put two and two together … or they’ve got some inside information … but whatever … they’re linking the shooting with an attempt on the life of a key witness in Stockwell’s trial.”
“But the sonovabitch even managed to wriggle outta that,” exclaimed Debbie, disgustedly.
“I knew it couldn’t be long until the truth came out,” continued Carl as he took the cup of freshly brewed coffee Debbie handed him.
“Carl was like a cat on a hot tin roof all day,” snorted Debbie. “I knew something was wrong.”
“And then I heard him take the call last night … I have never seen anyone look so fucking relieved about something … not that he actually came out with everything until this morning,” Debbie snorted, and having poured out all their coffees while the conversation had taken place, she now sat down on the sofa next to Carl and patted his knee.
“I’m afraid I gave him a hard time …”
Brian and Justin shot a look at Carl, who’d raised his eyes to the ceiling. ‘Hard time’ didn’t come into it. Debbie just hadn’t let up. It was obvious that Carl knew something about the incident at the airport and who was involved; probably though his old police connections, had surmised Debbie. And it was obvious to Carl too, that with Stockwell dead and no trial taking place, that the truth about Brian Kinney would very soon become public knowledge.
In truth, Debbie just wore Carl down! But Carl also thought that Brian might need some support right now and who better for that to come from, but those who he’d always regarded as family.
Brian found he was actually relieved that Debbie had come to him, instead of him having to go to Debbie, but how was the rest of the gang going to react when they found out?
“Michael and Ben are spending Christmas with Mel and Jenny Rebecca,” stated Debbie, almost reading Brian’s mind, but she was obviously a little disappointed that the family weren’t all together in Pittsburgh. In fact Michael had rung early, thankfully before Carl had sat Debbie down and told her the truth about Brian. And the minute she’d discovered Brian was in Pittsburgh, she got up of the sofa and picked up her coat. “Well … what are you waiting for?” she asked him and Carl had grinned at her. That was pretty much the reaction he was expecting.
“But the rest of the gang are coming for their dinner … as usual,” added Debbie with a grin.
“Even your mom and Tucker,” and she smiled at Justin.
“So … grab your things and we’ll get going,” and standing up, Debbie reached out for her coat which she’d taken off and was now lying over the back of the sofa. At the sound of silence, she looked around at Brian who didn’t know how to answer.
“You didn’t think I was gonna leave you two here on your own … on Christmas day, did you?” stated Debbie. “I’ve gotta thirty pound turkey in the oven that’s been cooking since 4:00 this morning ...”
“That could feed a small army,” grinned Brian, finding his voice and Debbie nodded and reaching out poked, Justin in the stomach. “Or Sunshine here,” she chortled and Brian laughed at Justin’s mock offense. “I never ate that much,” he insisted, only mildly insulted.
“Oh yes you did,” replied Brian and Debbie in unison.
“Well … come on … we left Em nursing that damn turkey … I’m sure he wondered what all the secrecy was this morning … he doesn’t have a clue why we suddenly deserted him.” In fact it had taken all of Debbie’s resolve not to let on what Carl had started to tell her before Em arrived and they’d stayed huddled in the living room while Em started to help out in the kitchen.
“Hang on, Debbie,” and Brian put out his hand to stop her. “I’m not sure about this.”
“Are you worried how Lindsay’s gonna take it … you being alive that is?” asked Debbie and Brian frowned.
“Or is it Gus you’re worried about?”
Brian didn’t answer, his face did his talking for him and gently, Debbie patted his arm.
“It’s going to take everyone a while to come to terms with all this … but the sooner you get started, the better.”
“Are you telling me you don’t want to see your son?” she asked him, defiantly and Brian shook his head and sighed.
“It’ll work out just fine … you’ll see,” Debbie sought to reassure Brian. “You just have to break the ice first.”
“Deb’s right, Brian,” agreed Justin. “You’ve lost too much time already.”
Brian nodded and took a deep breath. Whatever happened in the future, there was no way he wasn’t going to be a part of his son’s life any more. He couldn’t decline Debbie’s invitation now.
“It will take us a few minutes to pack Deb,” stated Brian. They hadn’t actually unpacked very much and it wouldn’t take long to throw their possessions back in their bags. “Give us a few minutes,” requested Justin and Debbie nodded. “Sure … we’ll wait in the car.”
Going upstairs to the bedroom to quickly pack, Justin reached into his case and brought something out instead and held it out to Brian.
“Here.”
“What is it?” asked Brian as he took the envelope from him. And then he turned it over and recognizing both the name and the writing, he took a deep breath before looking back at the younger man.
“You put me in charge of that and trusted me with it … and I’ve always had it with me,” stated Justin, quietly.
“I wondered when was the best time to use it … but now I don’t have to,” he continued and Brian nodded. Stepping even closer, Justin placed his hand on Brian’s arm and looked up into his eyes.
“Don’t let Gus read in a letter how much you love him … tell him,” urged Justin and Brian took another deep breath and then exhaled slowly.
“I fully intend to,” stated Brian, nodding and then he pocketed the letter he’d written to Gus all those years ago.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
With Debbie already in the car, Justin and Carl put the bags in the trunk. Brian locked the front door of the house and then put the keys back through the letter box. He’d called Coulter to tell them they were leaving and going to family. But after that, they hadn’t really made any plans.
On the drive back into the city, Brian watched as the familiar streets of the old neighborhood passed them by.
“It hasn’t changed much,” stated Debbie, but Brian was beginning to have second thoughts about all this by the time they reached Debbie and Carl’s house. But with Michael away, at least he wouldn’t have to go through it all with him for a while.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Debbie … I’ve prepared all the vegetables … so they’re ready to go on whenever you like … you just need to …”
Hearing the front door open, Emmett understandably assumed Debbie and Carl had returned from whatever chore had called them away. Drew had arrived a short while ago and the pair of them were in the kitchen, where they’d been preparing Christmas dinner and the sherry trifle for afterwards. Trouble was, at least as much sherry, if not more, had gone inside Emmett while he was working on their meal as had gone in their dessert.
“Hi Justin,” smiled Drew in surprise as he watched the group advance into the living room.
“Hmm?” Emmett looked at Drew and then at the group and his face lit up when he saw Justin.
“Hello baby … I didn‘t know you were coming,” stated Emmett obviously pleased and then despite Drew’s presence, he couldn’t resist raising an eyebrow towards the good looking bearded man who hung back slightly and then he grinned at Justin. Remembering Justin’s coyness at Thanksgiving about whether he had a new man in his life, Emmett naturally took it for granted that the man was his companion.
“I assume gorgeous at the back there is with you,” Emmett grinned at Justin and Brian, who now just couldn’t resist himself, moved a little closer.
“Well … if it isn’t Emmett Honeycutt.“
“If I’d known you had those sort of feelings for me all those years ago, Em …“ the man grinned at him and Emmett frowned.
“I’m sorry … do I know you?” Emmett asked him and then he answered his own question.
“I know you, don’t I?“ and Drew put a hand on his shoulder. He’d seen how Justin had turned and grinned at the man as if sharing a secret with him and had then slipped an arm through his; naturally, like he’d known him for years.
Drew‘s eyes narrowed, taking in the man‘s height, build and coloring. The guy was a little older, but then again, who wasn’t? And now Debbie appeared to be grinning and joining in the joke.
“Oh … my … god,” whispered Drew as he now held Brian’s gaze and the man grinned back at him.
“Brian Kinney … back from the dead …” Drew had heard news reports about the incident at the airport and its possible causes, and now he was beginning to have an inkling of what that might have been.
“What?!”
“WHAT?!” exclaimed Emmett, for a second time, and then he too, studied the man a little more closely. “Take away the beard,” instructed Drew and thankfully, he managed to catch Emmett before his partner hit the floor.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
With Drew shaking the dish towel over him as if the man was in a prize fight, Emmett slowly began to come round.
“Give him some air,” instructed Carl and the group who had gathered around started to step back as Drew helped Emmett to his feet.
“I think you better sit down,” stated Drew, as he helped him out into the living room.
“Yes … I think I need to … I think I’ve had too much Christmas cheer … I could have sworn …” and as Emmett eased himself down into the chair, he started to make out again the man who had caused his consternation.
“It can’t be … can it?” asked Emmett, in total confusion and Debbie chuckled. “Despite working your way through my sherry … you’ll be pleased to know you’re not that drunk … or maybe not,“ she chuckled.
“It’s true,” confirmed Justin, but Emmett continued to look at each of the group in turn, still trying to make sense of it all.
“It’s me, Em,” stated Brian and Emmett gulped.
“There is an explanation, I take it?” he queried.
“We had a memorial for you,” he continued accusingly, now pointing at Brian. “What the fuck is going on?”
“We’ll let Brian explain it later … when we’re all here,” stated Carl and he turned to him.
“That way … you’ll only have to say it the once,” he reassured him and Brian smiled gratefully.
“God … I need a drink,” stated Brian and he leaned down to kiss Justin, who‘d slipped his arm around Brian‘s waist. Emmett chuckled. “Now I know you’re Brian Kinney …”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Sipping his drink, Brian withdrew from the group a little and watched their interaction. Debbie was right at home, literally, being the fussy mom, making sure they had drinks and nibbles while they waited for their meal to finish cooking. Then the doorbell rang and Justin saw Brian shoot a glance in its direction and caught the look of fear he tried to hide.
“Well … that’ll either be Ted and Blake,“ stated Debbie.
“Or your mom and Tucker,“ she continued, smiling at Justin.
“Or … Lindsay, Donna and the kids,” stated Carl, almost as a warning for Brian. But no one moved; everyone looked at him. It was Justin who reacted first and who went to open the door while Brian got up out of his chair and moved out of sight through the kitchen and into the small laundry room, as he took a deep breath and tried to work out what the hell he was going to say, regardless of who it was now arriving.
“JUSTIN!”
Exclaimed Gus in unabashed delight at seeing Justin unexpectedly open the door to them and the youngster practically threw himself at him. Justin hugged him tightly. Lindsay, smiled broadly and once he’d disentangled himself from Gus, Justin hugged her too. Then it was Donna and Megan’s turn.
“Look what I got,” stated Gus and he proudly held out the latest Ipod.
“Wow … I’d love to see how that works,” stated Justin. “I tell you what … why don’t we go upstairs where it’s quiet for a little while … and you can show me,” stated Justin.
“Okay,” replied the youngster and Justin ignored Lindsay’s look of confusion as he started to follow Gus, who’d shot up the stairs, eager to show Justin the features on his Christmas present.
“Take Megan with you,” instructed Debbie and Justin halted and then reached down to pick up the little girl and take her up with them.
Lindsay and Donna exchanged glances and then Lindsay looked at Debbie and her eyes narrowed. “Honey … you better sit down,” urged Debbie and she guided the younger woman to a chair and Donna sat on its arm.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
As Debbie started to explain about Stockwell, Lindsay nodded and reached up to take Donna‘s hand, not sure where this conversation was going. Like everyone else, she’d heard about the shooting and also about Stockwell’s death. But she wasn’t prepared for what came next.
Lindsay didn’t know whether to laugh or cry when she learned that Brian was alive and that the reason he’d feigned death over five years ago was to evade those who sought to harm him and also protect those he loved, including Gus. And that he’d gone into the witness protection program as a vital witness in the case against Stockwell.
Lindsay’s hand flew up to her mouth as she realized that not only was Brian alive, but that he was here, in Pittsburgh, as he stepped out from behind the others and said a very quiet “Hi,” and tried to smile.
With Brian’s unfamiliar look, it took a moment for it all to sink in and then Lindsay switched from relief to fury and back again, and then sobbed, as Brian held her. And during all of this, Ted and Blake and then Jennifer and Tucker arrived and the look of shock, disbelief and joy on their faces just about matched the confusion shared with everyone else at the news about Brian.
It was tears all round and Debbie instructed that they should eat lunch before it got ruined and then allow Brian to go into explanations of what he’d been doing the past five years. But there was something Brian needed to do first.
“I’ll come up with you,“ offered Lindsay in order that should Gus be alarmed at the news that his dad was alive after all, that she’d be on hand to comfort him. So excusing themselves, they both made their way slowly up the stairs to Michael’s old room, where Gus was showing off his Christmas present.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Gently, Lindsay knocked on the door and looked in.
Looking up from where they were all sitting on the bed, Justin could tell that Lindsay had been crying and it didn’t take a genius to know the cause.
“Justin … could I have a few minutes with Gus, please?” asked Lindsay and Justin nodded.
“Sure,” and getting up off the bed, he ruffled Gus’ hair. “Catch you later,” Justin promised him and taking Megan by the hand, Justin led her out of the bedroom. Brian was standing out in the hall.
“Good luck,” whispered Justin, squeezing Brian’s arm as he went by and the older man took a deep breath.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Brian closed his eyes and leaned his head against the wall outside the bedroom door as he listened to Lindsay. As simply as possible, Gus’ mom tried to explain to him that sometimes, people have to do things they don’t want to do and that we don’t always understand why they do it at the time.
“Gus … your dad didn’t die … he had to go away,” stated Lindsay, sitting on the bed next to Gus. “He … he isn’t dead?” asked Gus in confusion and his mom shook her head and rubbed the back of Gus’ neck.
“No … he had to pretend he was dead so that some very bad men couldn’t find him,” explained Lindsay, not wanting to worry or confuse Gus even more by telling him that he could also have been a target.
“But those bad men have gone away now … which means your dad can come back …”
“Is he here?” asked Gus, his eyes wide and excited despite his bewilderment and Lindsay smiled. “Yes … he’s here,” confirmed his mom.
“Can I see him?” requested Gus.
“Are you sure you want to?” his mom asked him and Gus nodded. “Then … okay,” agreed Lindsay and taking that as his cue, Brian knocked quietly and then slowly pushed open wider the bedroom door and stepped in.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Brian took a deep breath. His stomach had been turning somersaults as he was waiting outside and being this close to his son again after so long, his emotions threatened to engulf him completely.
Lindsay stroked Gus’ cheek and then got up off the bed. The youngster remained sitting and he frowned at the unfamiliar face of the man standing in front of him.
“Are you my dad?” frowned Gus and Brian nodded.
“I sure am,” choked Brian and Lindsay smiled at him and squeezed his arm. “I’ll be outside,” she told them both and then pulling the door closed behind her, she left the room.
“Mom said you had to go away … because some bad men were after you,” stated Gus, eventually and Brian nodded, unable to speak until he cleared his throat.
“That’s right,” answered Brian, standing just inside the door. Wary of approaching Gus too soon in case his son shied away from him, Brian remained several feet away. With all his heart, he hoped the gulf between them, both physically and emotionally, would soon disappear. But for the moment, Gus remained seated on the bed and didn’t seem to want to come nearer.
“But they’re not after me any more,” stated Brian, hoping to reassure Gus and he saw his son frown.
“Then … are you going to stay … or will you go away again?” asked Gus, fearfully and Brian could see the tears forming in his son’s eyes, that were now a match for his own.
Brian shook his head, his heart breaking to see how scared his son was that he might leave him again. “No … I’m not going anywhere,” Brian assured him and he saw Gus’ bottom lip tremble.
Brian moved forward and knelt by the bed in front of him and Gus hesitated for a moment and then jumped into his dad’s waiting arms. Brian hugged him tightly; father and son clinging to each other, both instantly at ease and not afraid to show their feelings. And then Brian kissed the boy’s temple.
“I love you, Gus … and I’m never going to leave you like that again,” he promised him, breathlessly: a pledge that Brian was determined to uphold.
Hearing the exchange from out in the hall, Lindsay quietly opened the bedroom door to check that everything was alright. And what she saw gladdened her heart so much; seeing Brian and his son so close. Closing the door silently, Lindsay crept down the stairs to join the others, giving the boys some time to themselves.
Waiting downstairs, Justin was every bit as nervous as Brian had been, hoping the man and his son would be reconciled. Justin knew it would break Brian’s heart if the boy decided he wanted nothing to do with him. But Lindsay’s report cheered them all and then they heard the bedroom door open and then close and footsteps coming back down the stairs.
But, far more importantly, came the giggles and happy chatter of a young boy at Christmas time who had just been given the best present of them all.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The conversation over Christmas lunch was kept light and easy. Seating at the table was a little tight, with two more guests that had been planned for, but this was Debbie’s and Brian could remember many occasions when there was literally standing room only when the house had been thrown open to all and sundry. There was the usual toasts and one which included ‘absent friends’; the family not quite complete without Michael, Ben and Hunter. Nor indeed without Vic, Debbie’s brother who had passed away all those years ago, or his partner, Rodney, whose own health had also deteriorated suddenly and rapidly and had long ago gone to join his lover.
Then, after lunch and the children had exhausted themselves opening yet more presents and full from their meal, their mom’s had taken them both upstairs for a nap, thus allowing Brian to give indepth explanations.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Brian never said how bad it had been. How terrified he was, not for his own safety as much as for Justin and Gus. And then being separated from all he loved and having to build a new life among strangers and about having to leave Brian Kinney behind and become someone else. Instead he joked about the night life and abundance of gay men in San Francisco. But reading between the lines, it was obvious to everyone of them, how lonely the man had been and how much he’d missed them all. Unfortunately, Carl would be in for more ‘hard times’, when Brian disclosed how the man had sent him photographs of his son and more lately, of Justin.
“It had to be fate,” declared Debbie, as she later handed around the chocolate brazils.
“What?” asked Justin and Debbie repeated herself.
“It had to be fate,” she repeated, shrugging. “Why else would Sunshine here choose to be a teacher and take up a post in San Francisco … at the very same school as Brian?” queried Debbie and the two men looked at each other and smiled.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
They ate and drank plenty. It was getting late and Brian and Justin hadn’t even begun to make any plans.
“Where are we going to sleep tonight?” asked Justin, as he refilled Brian’s glass. “I haven’t even given it a thought,” stated Brian, truthfully and beginning to feel quite tired after the traumas of the day.
“I guess … we could go to the loft,” suggested Justin, a little warily and he saw Brian frown.
“It’s only four walls, Brian,” stated Justin, seeing how reluctant Brian seemed to be to return to the loft; where they’d spent their last night before the wedding was due to take place and where Justin had discovered Brian, unconscious and apparently so close to death. But it wouldn’t be easy for either of them to return there.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
With Gus and Megan still a little sleepy, Brian had carried his son to the car and strapped him in.
“Will I see you soon, dad?” asked Gus, yawning and Brian ruffled the boy’s hair and smiled.
“You bettcha, Sonnyboy” he promised him, his heart swelling at being able to use that endearment once more and Brian kissed Lindsay goodnight and then she, Donna and their children left for home.
“I’m keeping you to that,” Lindsay had told him, before closing the car door, but Brian had shaken his head. “You won’t need to,” came the determined reply.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
After saying goodnight to everyone and promising not to do another disappearing act, Carl drove Brian and Justin to the loft.
“Lucky I’ve still got the keys,” announced Justin after they’d said goodnight to Carl and they let themselves into the converted warehouse by the street entrance.
When the rickety elevator reached the top floor, Brian hesitated before getting out. Justin picked up their bags and watching the younger man slide open the heavy metal door, Brian couldn’t help thinking back to their last night there together, when he thought he would never see Justin again.
Justin had previously told Brian that he’d continued to live in the loft. He hadn’t needed to tell him that it had made him feel close to him there. But it did feel a little strange to Justin too, to be back here again with the man.
Putting down the bags he was carrying, Justin pulled the dustsheets off the furniture. “I think Ted occasionally used the place for clients,” Justin informed him and Brian frowned.
“Then I guess we should change the sheets,” he suggested, non too seriously and he closed the door behind them and Justin grinned.
“Knowing Ted, I’m sure he would already have done that anyhow.”
Brian looked around. Practically nothing had changed, it all just looked a little worn.
“Needs updating,” observed Brian and Justin nodded.
“If … if we end up staying here … then I guess we could do that,” he suggested and Brian shrugged. They still hadn’t really talked about where their future lie, not being able to see further than the court case, but they both knew they would now need to do that soon.
Going to the closet, Justin found the clean bed linen. The bed had been stripped already and he tossed the duvet cover to Brian.
“Here,”
“Yes, dear,” answered Brian, only a little sarcastically, and wondering, not for the first time, when it was they became so domesticated, but it actually felt good doing something so normal as make the bed for the two of them. Though there was a time when it wouldn’t have mattered if there was linen on the bed or not. Or, even if there was a bed, come to that.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Do you believe that?” asked Justin, later as he hung up the last of his clothing in the closet. Brian frowned. He was laying some of his clothes in the dresser and unsure what Justin was referring to.
“Believe what?”
“That it was fate … my going to San Francisco like that … and finding you?” continued Justin, as he toed off his shoes and pulled his sweater up and over his head.
Brian shrugged as he closed the drawer. “I dunno,” he answered him and then he sat down on the bed and started to untie his shoe laces.
“But … was it fate that you were standing under that lamp post … that very second I came out of Babylon that night?” Brian asked him, a definite mischievous look on his face. Justin grinned.
“Then I guess it was,” decided Justin and Brian nodded.
“Christ … that seems like a life time ago,” chuckled Justin, and now naked, he pulled back the duvet and climbed into bed.
“Yep,” answered Brian. “I guess you could say that.” But the question still begged, what was Brian’s life going to be like, now he could be who he really was again.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Accepting he couldn’t put it off any longer and in actual fact looking forward to seeing his friend, Brian knew he had to speak to Michael. And, when Michael and Ben arrived home two days after Christmas, Brian was waiting for them. Debbie, who had a key to their place, had done a little shopping for them and had taken Brian over, though it had taken all her resolve not to get on the phone and tell them about Brian right away.
Both men were stunned of course, though ultimately pleased that Brian was still alive, though Michael didn’t really try very hard to hide his annoyance that Brian hadn’t confided in him. Sitting down, Brian gave Michael and Ben the shortened version of everything he’d told Justin about why he’d had to leave and the method chosen. Ben was the first to acknowledge that if there had been any idea that Brian was still alive, that Michael, Justin and all the gang would have tried to find him and that ‘dying’ was the only sure fire way to prevent that happening.
Reluctantly, Michael agreed and, once over the shock, hugged his friend.
“What about you and Justin?” Michael asked him and Brian nodded. “We’re okay,” came the smile and confident answer.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The lull over Christmas didn’t last long and then the news broke about Brian’s involvement in the case against Stockwell once and for all. There were reporters and tv crews camped outside and Brian had to literally push through them on his way back from Michael and Ben‘s.
“It won’t be long ‘til you’re yesterday’s news,” Justin tried to reassure him.
As well as reports of Jim Stockwell‘s death in the newspapers and on tv,“ Stockwell Witness Returns from the Dead” read one banner headline and there, on the front page, was a photograph of Brian. Admittedly not a very good one, much to the man’s disgust, but there was no mistaking who it was. It would seem the whole world now knew that Brian had been a material witness in the case that had been built against Stockwell and whose life had been threatened. But a witness whose testimony would not now be needed after the man in question had died.
“King of Babylon Lives!,” proclaimed the local gay rag, who viewed Brian as something of a hero, again, in their fight against Stockwell.
Like the gang, Jennifer could hardly believe that Brian was alive and well and that he and Justin were together again. But seeing her son so happy at last, she could just about forgive her sort of son-in-law anything. But occupying her thoughts now was her daughter’s engagement. And, to Justin’s delight, Molly requested that he should give her away.
Ted broke the news to Cynthia, who’d seen the headline on the way into work and couldn’t believe what she was reading and assumed it was all a big mistake, until Ted put her right.
Ted rang Justin, not having Brian’s number, asking if Brian wanted to meet up and talk about the businesses. Brian hesitated, he really didn’t know how much of an involvement he wanted with the businesses at the moment and both the advertising agency and club had both been doing really well with Ted and Cynthia at the helm.
But, in the end, he couldn’t stay away and with no surprise to Justin, Brian took himself down to the office to see how Kinnetik looked after being away for so long.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Brian couldn’t help feel a mixture of pleasant surprise and pride, mixed with a little disappointment at how good the agency was actually doing without him. But then he knew he could rely on Ted, which was why he’d had no qualms in leaving the running of the businesses to both him and Cynthia in the first place.
Talking of which, when she saw him, Cynthia cried, something that Brian had always had difficulty dealing with, but was having to get used to.
The building had been recently refurbished and was sporting the latest technology and gadgetry and the order book was filled to capacity.
“I think the time for expansion has more than passed,” stated Ted, proudly, as Brian looked over the accounts.
“You think?” asked Brian and Ted nodded, excitedly.
“Sure … and I was thinking Chicago … New York maybe …”
Brian nodded. “Well, Theodore, I trust your judgment … if you say the business can expand … then … expand it.” “Really?” asked Ted and Brian grinned. “Go for it.”
“But …”
“But?” asked Brian, getting up from behind what used to be his desk.
“It’s not only the agency that could expand.”
“Babylon is doing great too … in fact both business are almost doing too well … we need to invest the profits … we don’t want to pay more tax than we have to,” Ted informed him, ever the accountant.
“Then do it,” instructed Brian but he saw Ted hesitate. “What?” he asked him and Ted sighed. “Taking over was fine … here and at the club …”
“So?” asked Brian, confused as to what the man’s problem was.
“But it needs a certain … flair … to put these things together from scratch … and I’m not sure I’m up to it,” confessed Ted, who wasn’t exactly being too unobvious with his meaning.
Brian hesitated. “I’ll … I’ll think about it,” he promised him and Ted nodded. And then opening up the safe, Ted produced a check book and handed it to him.
“You’ll need this,” he told him and Brian hesitated before taking it.
“It’s access to the checking account … it’s only what you’re entitled to … after all … it was you who started the business.”
Brian smiled and reaching out, took the check book from him. There was no getting away from the fact that it would be good to have more funds and the man was eager for him to have his due.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Justin was right, within a few days Brian’s story had been replaced by something else and the reporters and tv crews had given up and moved away after growing tired with only hearing Brian’s: “No comment,” when he left his home and was forced to run the gauntlet.
And one of the first places Brian headed, when he knew he was no longer the focus of attention, was the art store.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“I wondered where you disappeared to,” stated Justin, and he eyed the large package Brian brought in with him, which was carefully deposited on the kitchen counter.
“Merry Christmas,” smiled Brian and he pushed the package across the counter towards Justin and took off his coat.
“It’s a little late for that, isn’t it?” the other man pointed out and Brian made to take the package back. “Well … if you don’t want it …”
“I never said that,” jumped in Justin and grinning broadly, he reached out and drew the package towards him. Opening it up, he discovered the most expensive art set in existence and his mouth dropped open in astonishment at the materials it contained.
“I noticed you didn’t have one any longer,” stated Brian, hoping that with all the tools necessary provided, that Justin would continue to spend more time on his art and the younger man swallowed; not missing Brian’s intentions.
“It’s beautiful … thank you,” came Justin’s genuine response.
“And I actually have a late Christmas present for you … I only just finished it …” and Justin disappeared into the bedroom and from the closet, retrieved a flat package, covered in brown paper, which he handed to Brian.
“What’s this?” the man asked him and Justin waited while Brian placed the package on the counter and opened it up.
“I didn’t know what to get you and it still needs framing … but I made a drawing from the photograph I took of Gus at Thanksgiving,” stated Justin. “I hope you like it.”
Looking at his son’s smiling face, Brian nodded and could hardly speak. This was infinitely preferable to the photograph, with Justin capturing Gus so perfectly.
“Thank you,” smiled Brian at last and indeed two more perfect Christmas presents couldn’t be exchanged.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
There was also one other late Christmas present that Brian purchased, after having checked out the details with Special Agent Coulter. And that was a two weeks paid vacation for FBI Agent Reynolds and his family at a popular first class resort during Spring break, Brian having discovered that the agent was indeed married with children.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“I was thinking,” stated Justin, as things were now quiet and they could go out without being bothered or even followed.
“Why don’t we go to Babylon tonight … going by what Ted said … it should be worth checking out.”
“In fact … why don’t I ring the gang … get them all down there … it’ll be like old times.”
Brian chuckled. “Don’t you think we’re a bit old for all that now?” he asked him and Justin looked suitably offended. “Speak for yourself!”
“But considering you do actually still own the place … aren’t you interested in seeing how it’s doing?”
Brian kind of shrugged and nodded at the same time. “Okay … we will.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Justin did the ringing around and everyone laughed, but agreed that it would be a great idea to get together at Babylon again. And, just before 11:00, like the old days, in trooped Brian, Justin, Ted, Blake, Emmett, Drew, Michael and Ben, deciding to meet outside on the steps, for old time’s sake. But their entrance didn’t go unnoticed by the teens; illegal but their ID said otherwise, and the mostly twenty-something crowd in attendance.
Brian looked around him and even though the place looked good, basically, nothing had changed. That same old Thumpa Thumpa, its calling still as strong as ever, pulling the now younger generation into the club.
Going up to the bar and ordering their drinks, Brian looked around and surveyed the crowd; so many beautiful young men, many bare chested and glistening with perspiration, strutting their stuff.
“You know,” yelled Ted into his ear. “I was thinking about trying out a Senior’s night …”
“A what?” yelled Blake before Brian could ask him what the hell he was talking about and Justin chuckled.
“A Senior’s night … say once a month … where the older generation …”
“Like us you mean,” chortled Ben in his beer, but Ted preferred to ignore him and continued.
“Where the older generation can get together without feeling self-conscious,” and he shrugged. “Why should the kids have all the fun?” asked Ted of the group.
Emmett nodded. “Well I guess they can still bump and grind with the best of them,” but Brian almost shuddered; that sounded like one of his worst nightmares.
Ted could see Brian wasn’t exactly thrilled at the idea, but reminded him that: “They’re the ones with plenty of cash to spend, remember,” and Brian shrugged. Thinking about it from a business angle, it might actually not be a bad idea.
“Well … you could try it for a few months … see how it goes down,” he suggested and Ted grinned, taking that as approval.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Standing at the bar, nursing their drinks, the gang still hadn’t ventured out onto the dance floor and Brian shook his head as he watched two especially beautiful young men dancing just a few feet away.
Brian groaned and Justin frowned. “I feel like an old man,” Brian told him with a sigh and Justin chuckled.
“Then you’re in luck … ‘cos so do I,” he grinned at him mischievously and taking him by the hand, Justin led Brian out into the middle of the dance floor. Emmett smiled broadly as he watched them go. In fact, the whole gang watched Brian and Justin dance for a while, like old times, before they decided: ‘What the hell’ and joined them.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Brian and Justin got together with the gang, Debbie and Carl, Jennifer, Tucker, Molly and Stephen and, of course, Daphne, over the next couple of weeks. Daphne only just forgiving Justin for being rather economical with the truth regarding the teacher he said looked like Brian. But of course she would forgive him, seeing how wonderfully happy he and Brian now were.
But after being back for only a couple of weeks, with nothing to work on or anything definite to aim for, both Brian and Justin were starting to get restless.
“I wonder how the students are doing?” queried Justin over breakfast one morning and Brian shrugged.
“You miss them?” he asked him and Justin nodded. “I enjoyed teaching … and I kinda feel guilty … that I’m not there.”
“I mean … I undertook a commitment … but I didn’t see it through.”
Brian nodded, that he could understand and he kind of felt the same way too. Looking up, he could see Justin was obviously mulling something over.
“What’s up?”
“You want to go back, don’t you?” Brian asked him but Justin shrugged. “I’m gonna have to do something … I’m going crazy … I was thinking about going and getting some more sketchbooks.”
“I like the sound of that … about you working on your art I mean,” stated Brian. “But as for the other …” and he sighed. “I made a promise to Gus … that I wouldn’t leave him again.”
“I want to be a part of my son’s life,” reaffirmed Brian. “I don’t wanna make do with only cameo appearances any longer.”
“I understand,” stated Justin. “I just need to work out what it is I want to do.”
Brian frowned, it wasn’t only Justin who was wondering that.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Ask him,” stated Lindsay and Brian frowned at her.
“What?”
“Ask your son … about you going back to San Francisco,” stated Lindsay. She’d come around to see how Brian was doing. She could see he was looking restless and the subject had gotten around to how he’d actually enjoyed teaching and hated leaving the students mid year.
“I said I wouldn’t leave him again, and I meant it,” stated Brian and Lindsay nodded. “Then just go back to the summer … make sure your students get a good grounding … and those that are ready through their qualifications … and then come back.”
“Gus can come out and see you at Spring break … he’ll love San Francisco,” stated Lindsay and she could see by Brian’s hesitation that he might actually consider it.
“And this time … you can speak on the phone to him every day …”
“Your son knows you love him … this time around he’s old enough to understand what that means …”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“You could get a webcam,” suggested Justin, later in the day, when Brian related his conversation with Lindsay.
“That way you could see each other too,” the younger man continued. “But I think Lindsay’s right … I think Gus is old enough to understand that you‘d only be away for a few months this time.”
In the end, it wasn’t Brian, but Lindsay who mentioned to Gus the possibility that his dad might be going away again. His mom knew exactly how to raise the subject and not upset the boy and to say that it would only be for a little while and that he could visit his dad, email him and talk on the phone every day.
“Can I have my own cellphone?” asked Gus, brightening up after he’d considered what his mom had told him and Lindsay closed her eyes and couldn’t help smiling; her son learned quickly.
“Only if you promise me that you’ll only use it to phone home and your dad,” stated Lindsay.
“And Justin and Grandma Debbie,” corrected Gus and Lindsay smiled. “And Justin and Grandma Debbie,” agreed his mom. “Great,” answered Gus, smiling, but he still had some thinking to do.
Lindsay and Donna’s relationship seemed to be strong and loving and Donna had no objections as to how much of an influence Gus’ father wanted to have in his son’s life, as long as he didn’t contradict her and Lindsay’s discipline of him in front of the youngster. Brian readily agreed, that sounded more than fair enough, but stated that if he had any queries, he wouldn’t hesitate to raise them.
Gus had seen Brian every couple of days so far and starting back to school after the Christmas break, Brian had regularly picked his son up after class. Gus enjoyed school, but was a little alarmed to learn that his dad had become a teacher.
“In business school,” Brian informed him and at the loft one wet Sunday afternoon in early January, Justin showed the boy the sort of computer wizardry that was possible.
“Wow!”
“Is that what you teach the kids?” asked Gus in amazement and Justin grinned and nodded.
“Something like that … but they’re not really kids … they’re more like grown ups.”
“They are?” asked Gus and Justin nodded. Gus frowned.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Is my dad a nice teacher?” asked Gus later, while Brian was on the phone ordering take out as a treat for dinner and Justin nodded. “Yes … he is … and he’s very good too … the students all like him,” came the confirmation.
“And you say they’re grown ups?” asked Gus and Justin realized what the youngster was getting at.
“Sure … they’re much older than you,” he reassured him, sensing that Gus had been worried about sharing his dad with kids his own age.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Would I get to ride the cable cars?” asked Gus, out of the blue and over dinner.
“Cable cars?” asked Brian, confused at the question and he looked across the table at Justin who mildly shrugged.
“In San Francisco,” continued Gus. “If you go back to school.”
Putting down his fork, Brian leaned back in his chair. “Would you mind … if I went back to San Francisco for a little while?” he asked him and Gus shook his head.
“Mom said you wouldn’t be gone very long … and that I could come and visit.”
“And she said I could have my own cell so that I could call you all the time,“ continued Gus and Brian smiled, thinking that Lindsay always did know how to sell something.
“Well … no … it wouldn’t be for long … just until the summer … and sure you could come and stay,” and Brian was starting to get excited already, at the prospect of spending the whole of the Spring Break with Gus and showing him the sights of San Francisco; a real father and son experience.
“Great!” exclaimed Gus and Justin grinned at Brian. Well, apparently the decision had been made, as long as Dean Millar was in agreement of course. But going back to SF would also mean that Brian could accomplish something else, face to face. Something he’d promised he would do should he get the chance.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
To say Dean Millar was surprised to get a phonecall from Pittsburgh was an understatement. The two locum teachers were doing a reasonable job, helped by the fact that both Mr. Taylor and Mr. Kennedy were well organized and thorough. But Millar was preparing an ad to go out for permanent staff for the start of the new school year.
The news of Brian’s involvement in the witness protection program had barely registered on the west coast and the Dean was pleased to get the call to say that both of his errant teachers would like to return to complete the school year, if that were possible. But the fact that it wouldn’t be Brogan Kennedy who would be returning, but Brian Kinney taking up the post, did need a little more explanation. But Brian promised it wouldn’t have any adverse effect on the students and the Dean was happy to let them come back.
But before they could head back to SF, there was someone Brian had to see.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Brian hated himself for it, but he actually felt a little nervous as he rang the doorbell.
There would be no loving reception here, he knew that, but then again, there’d never been any words of kindness or encouragement from his mother in his entire life. And what feelings she might have had for him turned to contempt the day Joan Kinney discovered her son was queer.
“I’d heard you were alive,” came the greeting as she showed him into the hall. “But I’m sorry you saw fit for me to learn that fact from a news broadcast rather than you telling me in person.”
Brian shrugged. The truth was he barely gave his mother a thought; they were estranged as far as he was concerned and he couldn’t see that changing any time soon. But strangely, he still felt he had a duty to call on her and let her know he was alive after all.
“Well … I’m here now,” came the answer, as Brian followed her into the parlor and he remained standing as Joan sat down on the sofa.
Joan nodded. “I trust your time away from Pittsburgh … and all those … those influences have led you to see the error of your ways.”
Brian tried not to grin, because San Francisco had no such influences, of course. Sure it did, only a hundred times more so.
“Not exactly,” replied Brian and the coldness in Joan’s voice and the hardness in her face showed him exactly the regard with which his mother held him.
“Then to me … you might just as well be dead … you’ll be in hell soon enough,” stated Brian’s ever loving mother.
Brian nodded and rolled his lips into his mouth. Thinking back, Brian recalled how hard and painful it had been to have to lie to Justin and the people who actually did care about him and then leave them. Knowing what they would no doubt go through believing he was dead.
But especially leaving Justin and Gus, and moving to a new town in a new state; alone and isolated and not knowing who the fuck he was and what he was going to do with the rest of his life.
“You know … I’ve already been there,” he informed her, truthfully and turning away from Joan, he started to make for the door, but when he reached it, Brian hesitated and then turned around to face her.
“Oh … and while I was there … I ran into Jack …”
“He says he’s keeping a place for you,” stated Brian coldly, and he opened the door and let himself out into the street, taking a welcomed deep breath of air as he closed the door behind him.
The next time Brian would have any involvement with Joan Kinney was when he arranged her funeral. Though it would always be hurtful that he’d never had the relationship with either of his parents that he would have hoped for. But that was their loss, not his.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The students were rapped to get their two favorite teachers back, not that their stand-ins hadn’t done a good job, because they had. A few of them had, however, heard about the Stockwell case and how a witness had been forced to flee Pittsburgh and assume a new identity, a name that they’d heard before. But after a brief explanation and statement that there was no way it should ever be mentioned again, the students eventually gave up on it and buckled down to some serious work, now in Mr. Kinney‘s class.
But even before they’d started back to school, Brian had another visit to make.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Hi,” smiled the man with hazel eyes and for a moment, Nicholas hesitated, and then he returned the smile.
“Brogan … this is a surprise … come on in,” and opening up the door to the penthouse, Nicholas stepped back and let him in.
“How are you?”
“Good … I had a good Christmas,” answered Nicholas. “You?”
“I’m good … and I had a good Christmas too,” came the answer and Nicholas nodded and then frowned.
“You wanna drink?” he asked him, while he was still trying to work out why the man was here.
“Sure,” and going over to the drinks cabinet, Nicholas picked out the bottle of Beam and turned towards his visitor, offering up the bottle. Receiving a nod in confirmation, Nicholas poured out their drinks and passed one over and both men sat on the sofa. Nicholas took a sip of his drink as he waited.
“I said if I was ever in the position … that I’d tell you about … about my past,” came the start of the explanation and then he looked down into his glass and Nicholas shrugged.
“You don’t have to … I have a feeling it’s pretty painful,” observed the man and he saw the other nod before taking a swallow of his drink. “Some,” he acknowledged and the man took a deep breath.
“First of all … my name isn’t Brogan Kennedy … it’s Brian Kinney.“
“And I was in the witness protection program,” he stated frankly, and Nicholas’ eyes open wider. “Go on,” he encouraged him and taking another swallow of his drink, Brian rolled the glass around in his hands.
“I was the only witness who could tie a crooked Pittsburgh ex-Police Chief into possible links with organized crime,” continued Brian and Nicholas blinked.
“Stockbridge … no Stockwell … I saw it on the news … I remember it because the Pittsburgh connection reminded me … of you,” Nicholas admitted and Brian managed a smile in acknowledgement and he took a deep breath.
“A dance club I owned was bombed … the Police have never been able to pin it on anyone.”
“Then there was a direct attempt on my life … five … nearly six ... years ago now.”
“They messed with my car … I was lucky … my son and … and Justin were supposed to be with me.”
“You have a son?” asked Nicholas in surprise and Brian nodded. “He’s eleven … quite the young man now,” and Nicholas heard the sadness in Brian’s voice.
“So … does that mean you didn’t see your son for five years?” asked Nicholas and Brian nodded. “I had to leave everything … and everyone … behind … for their sakes as much as mine,” stated Brian and he heard the expulsion of air.
“Christ,“ exclaimed Nicholas. “That explains a lot.”
Brian nodded. “I couldn’t tell you before … it was potentially dangerous for anyone else to know … but Stockwell‘s dead now … and without him … so‘s the case.”
“So … you just disappeared?” asked Nicholas and now it was his turn to hear the other man sigh. “No … I had to die,” came the unexpected explanation and at that Nicholas drained his glass and got up for a refill.
“It was the only way,” Brian went on to explain as Nicholas topped up his glass too. “I knew Justin would try and find me otherwise … he had to believe … they all had to believe I was dead.”
“Christ Bro … Brian,” remembered Nicholas and he shook his head. “I can’t even begin to understand how rough all that must have been on you.” Brian nodded. “Not just me … but also the people I left behind.”
The men fell into silence as they both consumed their drinks and it was Nicholas who eventually spoke first. “So … why did you come back here?“
“Justin and I both felt guilty about leaving our students mid term … we made commitments we didn’t keep … we’ve only come back for the rest of the school year … then we’re going back to Pittsburgh.”
“So … who are you now? Brogan Kennedy … or Brian Kinney?” Nicholas asked him and the man sitting across from him smiled.
“Brian Kinney,” stated Brian and Nicholas raised his glass in salute.
“Then good luck … Brian Kinney,” wished Nicholas, sincerely.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
They talked a little about how Nicholas’ agency was doing as they finished their drinks and the man wasn't at the least surprised to hear that Brian was in the business himself afterall. Then, getting up, Brian moved to the drink cabinet where he deposited his empty glass. That’s when he noticed the sweater draped over the chair, definitely too small for Nicholas. Brian picked up the sleeve and looked over at the man and raised an eyebrow. Nicholas chuckled.
“Andrew’s been spending some time here … “
“Actually … he’s been spending a lot of time here,” admitted Nicholas, with a smile.
“You don’t have to explain anything to me,” Brian told him. “But I’m glad … he always did have the hots for you.” Nicholas grinned again. “I think I remember you telling me that before … and … and … he’s a nice guy,” he admitted, if a little coyly and Brian grinned back.
“Yes … he is … and I think he’s just what you need,” admitted Brian and Nicholas grinned again, knowingly. In fact Nicholas had been surprised at the feelings he’d started to develop for Andrew and for a short while was afraid it was a rebound reaction to the departure of his former lover. But, as time passed, Nicholas began to realize his affection for the much younger man were genuine and growing stronger all the while, and Andrew seemed to feel that way too.
“I better go,” stated Brian, after a few moments comfortable silence, but before he could head for the door, Nicholas headed for him and before Brian could stop him, the man gave him a hug.
“I hope you’ve found what you need, too,” stated Nicholas and now it was Brian who smiled.
“Oh … I have,” he assured him and Brian hugged the man back before they made their goodbyes.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
With the new semester underway and getting back into a routine, Brian and Justin continued to work well together, but the fact they were together couldn’t go unnoticed, not that they made any attempt to conceal the fact.
The school had always had a policy that teachers shouldn’t get involved, gay or straight, but considering the men were only due to stay up until the summer, Millar decided not to make an issue out of it.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Brian and Gus had talked on the phone at least twice a day, if not more, since Brian had been back in SF and, taking Justin’s suggestion on board, Brian and Gus both got webcams they could use; Brian with his laptop at home and Gus with the family computer that was in the living room as Lindsay believed it wasn’t particularly healthy for a boy of Gus’ age to have his own up in his bedroom.
Gus also talked with Justin and occasionally with Granny Debs, as he’d started to call her and if that had come from anyone else, Deb would have had a blue fit. But not when it came from Gus.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Spring Break couldn’t come round fast enough for any of them, for Justin was also looking forward to seeing Gus again, who arrived at the very start of the holiday. Gus could hardly contain his excitement at traveling on his own, albeit with an escort from the airline, but it made him feel like a grown up with none of his family flying out with him.
But Gus wasn’t the only one who couldn’t contain his excitement and Brian spent days investigating what there was in SF that he could take his young son to.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Seeing Gus again just confirmed for Brian that there was no way he ever wanted to be separated from him again for any length of time and the sooner this school year was over the better from that point of view.
Justin loved having the youngster around too. In fact all three of them enjoyed spending time together and Brian’s heart swelled when he saw his son and his partner getting on so well. He always knew he could trust Justin when it came to looking out for Gus and he was grateful he’d been around for his son when he couldn’t.
But then the break came to an end and Gus had to go back home and there was more than one of them with tears in their eyes as they waved the young man off.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“I’m glad we did this,” stated Justin as they sealed the last of the boxes. They were packing up the apartment and everything they didn’t want with them on the plane was being freighted to the loft in Pittsburgh. Brian nodded in agreement.
It had been a great idea to come back to San Francisco. For Justin, it meant he could finish the year with the students he‘d started with and, hopefully, set them on their way with a good enough grounding to complete their course.
For Brian, the same reasons for coming back as Justin applied, but also, it meant he‘d been able to talk to Nicholas as well as bring some closure to his life as Brogan Kennedy, rather than just be told that he no longer needed the assumed identity any longer. After all, Brian had lived as Brogan for five years and that time needed to have real closure.
And for both of them, it meant that Brian and Justin could spend time away from any pressure and painful memories for either of them in Pittsburgh, as their relationship grew stronger and stronger, preparing them for their return.
Their flight wasn’t leaving until the afternoon and the following morning, before they left, there was only one task remaining in order to say goodbye to Brogan Kennedy for good.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Brian groaned at how he’d been persuaded to let Justin undertake this particular task. But sitting naked on the toilet seat, Brian allowed Justin to divest him of his beard.
Squirting the shaving foam into his hand, Justin carefully applied it to Brian‘s face and neck. “Just be careful,” Brian had warned him, glad he didn’t own a cutthroat, but he had to admit, how sensuous it was to feel the razor, in Justin’s hand, slide over his skin. And, also naked and sitting astride him, Justin took his time.
“I hope this john holds out,” mumbled Brian, but Justin’s response was to “Shh,” him as he concentrated and Brian tried not to smile as he watched Justin’s face, so close to his own, and observe the younger man’s eyes narrow in concentration and saw how he bit his lip as he undertook the task so seriously.
Having slowly and carefully shaved down one side of Brian’s face, reaching across to the sink, Justin rinsed off the razor before turning his attention to the other side. With his fingers beneath Brian’s chin, he tipped the man’s head back slightly, giving him greater access. Then he rinsed the razor again before moving down to Brian’s throat, carefully, removing the hair and the last remaining traces of Brogan Kennedy.
Justin smiled as the Brian Kinney he’d always known finally returned. He dropped the razor in the sink and picked up the towel and started to dry Brian off. But with Brian’s head tilted back again, Justin kissed the man’s throat and heard Brian moan.
Slowly, Justin licked up the side of Brian’s face and sought his mouth. “I know we have fucked in the strangest places,” stated Brian, still hoping the porcelain would take the weight of both of them. How would they explain that to the insurance company?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Finally showering and dressing and now, heading off to the airport and getting on the plane and leaving San Francisco, Brian had indeed left Brogan Kennedy behind.
Having obtained a new issue of his passport and making sure Justin had his, Brian suggested that they get away for a while, just the two of them. Justin had grinned, he couldn’t think of anything else he’d rather do than be alone with Brian for a few days, but he wasn’t expecting this particular destination.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Ibiza, one of the Balearic Islands, lies 90 km off the east coast of Spain, in the Western Mediterranean.
Ibiza town has little cobbled streets and an array of shops and trendy boutiques, cafes, restaurants and bars and a thousand years of history. Not forgetting the “Street of the Virgins' (Calle de la Virgen) which is the gay street and packed with gay venues.
And then there’s Ibiza’s fabulous gay nudist beach, just a short ride out of town, occupying an idyllic nature reserve location, with sandy, low-rise sand-dunes, perfect for swimming on a hot summer day.
“Well … we finally made it,” stated Brian, if a little wistfully.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
They ate in the beach-bar-café restaurant, or just relaxed in the sun, amongst the most wonderful array of naked men. Men who didn‘t look twice at a couple of guys making out among the sand dunes.
“First time I actually got an all over tan that wasn’t from a sun bed,” admitted Brian as he lay back on the towel.
The hotel Brian had chosen had cabins away from the main building, among palm trees. On Ibiza, the palm trees don’t grow naturally, but they have been planted all over the island and Brian chose a cabin nestled among the thickest and closest to the water‘s edge and affording the greatest privacy.
Getting away from everyone, spending the time together, just the two of them, eating, bathing in the beautifully warm waters, getting a tan and making love, not necessarily in that order, had been the most wonderful ten days either man could remember. It also gave them a chance to really talk about the future and where they wanted to go.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Okay … I admit … I’m missing art,” stated Justin, sitting down on the bed, naked and reaching for the bottle of wine from the cooler. Brian inwardly sighed. Thank God! He’d been waiting for Justin to say that for so long and it was actually a relief to hear it.
“Well … we said no more secrets … no more lies … and that we’d be open and honest with each other,” continued Justin and Brian nodded as he held out his glass for Justin to refill.
“Yes … we did … and that includes telling each other what it is we want to do with our lives.”
“Art has always been such a huge part of yours, Justin … and after everything you went through,“ continued Brian.
“I really can’t imagine you wanting nothing to do with it … and I don’t just mean the sketches you’ve been doing lately.”
Brian took a sip of his wine and stretched out, also naked, against the pillows. The sun was finally setting and they could hear the lapping of the water on the rocks. At last, it was beginning to cool and with the windows open, the drapes billowed out in the light evening breeze.
Looking over at Justin in the last of the sun’s rays streaming through the windows, Brian thought the younger man had never looked more beautiful. The sun had bleached Justin’s hair even whiter, emphasizing the blue of his eyes, eyes that matched the ocean and yet his skin now honey-toned in contrast to its usual alabaster.
“Justin … you could never be true to yourself if you didn’t have art in your life … I know that,” stated Brian and Justin took a swallow of his own drink and smiled at him; Brian always did know him better than he knew himself. In fact, you could say that for both of them.
“So promise me you’ll do something about it … when we get back to Pittsburgh,” urged Brian and Justin smiled and nodded. “I promise,” he told him, knowing that whatever he did, Brian would support him and he loved him all the more for it.
“What about you?” asked Justin, scooting up the bed, careful not to spill his drink and now laying on the pillows beside him, he surveyed Brian approvingly. Brian was still as hot as ever and relaxing together these last few days, Justin couldn’t help notice the man’s body as he stretched out beside him, tanned and lean. Brian had always been elegant, dressed or undressed and now, without the beard, looked as beautiful as ever.
“Despite enjoying teaching … don’t you miss running your own business?” Justin asked him and Brian slowly nodded. Yes, he did enjoy the teaching and he was good at it, but it didn’t have the cut and thrust he’d enjoyed in putting together a presentation, fighting off the competition, winning the contract and delivering a first class advertising campaign.
Building up Kinnetik and owning Babylon, had been immensely satisfying for Brian, considering his poor beginnings and he’d been proud of his achievements. And yes, he did miss it.
“Ted wants to expand the business … both businesses,” stated Brian and Justin grinned. “I can see it now … a whole string of Babylon’s across the USA.”
“Maybe,” stated Brian and Justin blinked at his tone. “Sounds like you’ve been thinking about that … that seemed more like a ‘probably’ to me,” and Brian shrugged. “There’s no reason why not … and there’s no reason why there shouldn’t be more Kinnetik’s either.”
“As long as they don’t take me away from Gus … or you … for more than … what … a coupla weeks at a time … and that wouldn‘t be very often … I’d make sure of that.”
“That’s not too long, is it?” asked Brian with concern and Justin shook his head. “No … I don’t think so … I’m sure you’ll work something out … we both will.”
“But that’s it … I don’t just want us to work something out … I want something that really works … not making do,” stated Brian.
“We will,” replied Justin, seriously and determinedly. “We can make happen whatever we want.”
Looking over at him, Brian nodded and smiled, knowing that with Justin beside him, the two of them together, supporting and loving one another, that’s exactly what they could do. But it would be nice to still do something together.
“I was thinking,” started Brian, a little hesitantly, wondering how Justin might take to the idea. “About starting up my own business school.”
“There’s no holding you back now … is there?” chortled Justin, though he was actually extremely impressed with the idea.
“Seriously … I sometimes wondered what the hell they were teaching kids … when I first started up Kinnetik and looking for staff.”
“I know what the market needs … and I know how to teach the people to work in it,” and he shrugged. “Seems like the perfect solution … and get the brightest and best talent into the business … and …” Brian hesitated and Justin frowned.
“And?”
“I’m gonna need someone to help me out with the graphic art side … not so it interferes with … that person’s own career,“ Brian pointed out. “But … but someone who can give me some good advice … or at least help me appoint the right people,” suggested Brian and it was pretty obvious he’d thought about this seriously and who he thought that person might be.
“Like me?” asked Justin and Brian shrugged. “Like I say … only if it doesn’t interfere with your own art.”
“But something we could work on together,” stated Justin and Brian nodded, mentally crossing his fingers as he waited for Justin to consider the idea.
“I’ll think about it,” stated Justin and Brian nodded, if a little disappointed that the younger man didn’t seem as terribly excited about the idea as he had.
“Okay … I’ve thought about it,” continued Justin, barely ten seconds later and he grinned broadly. “And I’d love to do it … and I’ve even got the perfect premises.”
Brian frowned, but then he began to wonder whether Justin had the same idea he had. “Yeah? Where?” Brian asked him.
“Well,” continued Justin. “Kinnetik happen to own this really big, beautiful house … sits in its own grounds … even has …” “Stables and a pool?” cut in Brian and Justin grinned at him.
“Funny you should mention that …” They had only briefly talked about the house before when Justin told him how Ted suggested Kinnetik use it themselves when he couldn’t bear the thought of living there without Brian.
“I’m glad you think it’s a great idea to use the house,” stated Brian, remembering that magical day when he took Justin to see it and they made love in front of an open, roaring fire and, looking over at Justin, seeing the wistful look on the younger man‘s face, Brian wondered, again, if he and Justin were thinking exactly the same thing.
“Do you think we’ll ever live there?” asked Justin and Brian frowned. “We could … if you wanted.”
“Actually … it would be a great place for Gus … especially during summer vacation … instead of cooped up inside the loft.” Brian was determined to spend as much time with his son as he could and thankfully, Lindsay didn’t object. After all, they had him most of the week and were quite happy, as long as Gus was and, of course, he was, that the boy spend maybe alternate weekends and certainly large portions of school recess with Brian and Justin.
“He’s a great kid … and it‘s a large house,” sighed Justin and Brian nodded. “Yeah it is,”
“It could take lots of kids …” Brian let his words trail off and it was a moment before Justin looked at him quizzically, wondering if Brian was meaning what he thought he was, but the man merely stated:
“You’d make a great dad … you know that, don’t you?” Brian told him and Justin smiled and took a sip of his drink. Brian didn’t continue, but somehow Justin knew that was Brian’s way of saying he wouldn’t actually mind having children with Justin one day and the younger man felt the glow grow in his heart.
In fact, Brian loved the idea. After all, he’d discovered how much he loved Gus and how much he actually enjoyed being his father. It would be incredibly selfish to deny Justin the same experience. And what beautiful babies too, if Brian and Justin combined their seed.
“So … to the future,” stated Brian, holding up his glass and proffering his own, Justin clinked his glass against Brian’s.
“To the future,” came the reply and then the drinks were forgotten as Justin stretched out and picked up a handful of ice that hadn’t melted from the cooler.
“Arrgghh!”
Justin couldn’t help giggling as he leaned down to lick the ice from Brian’s chest, knowing he would pay for that later and relishing the thought as he now stroked the inside if Brian‘s thigh.
It always seemed so natural, the way they were able to shed their clothes and enjoy each other’s nakedness, without any self-consciousness. Brian and Justin’s bodies fitted together so comfortably, as one, as the love and longing they shared for each other consumed them, again and again. Feelings they knew would never change, whatever the future held.
The End … but not quite.
Many, many thanks to Judy and Lois and to so many people who have supported me.