It's A Mystery 



Brian left the Rage party as soon as he was able to get away unnoticed. He started toward the Jeep and thought the long walk to the loft would do him good. Help clear his head and give him time to think. Justin was bound to move out if not tonight then soon. He had to shove the damn kid off this cliff. Justin was nineteen the banjo player wouldn't last, but at nineteen, nothing lasts and Justin needed to learn this life lesson. 


He was going to miss Justin. His life ran so much smoother with him around. He smiled to himself thinking about all the 'little woman' things Justin had done for him. The laundry and dry cleaning was always done, he had food in the fridge when he needed it. The cheques for the cleaning lady, phone and utilities were always printed out on the computer and waiting for his signature. Yes, he was going to miss him. What he would miss the most of course was waking up beside Justin, with his blonde head buried into his side, like a puppy seeking warmth. 


He loved that blonde brat, more than he had thought possible. Brian pulled out his wallet and looked at the card he'd bought last week. One of those clichd things all hearts and flowers, business card size with the saying "If you love him set him free, if he loves you he'll be back." He sighed, Brian Kinney, Advertising Guru, using some hopped up ad guys clich to run his life, who'd have thunk it? 


Week one: 


Brian was exhausted when he pulled open the door to the loft. He slowly walked over to the fridge to get a water, hoping that there was at least one more left. He'd have to try and pull himself together for grocery shopping tomorrow. He opened the fridge pulling out a water. He started to drink it when it suddenly sunk in what he'd seen. He opened the fridge again and there was a dinner salad complete with sliced chicken on one shelf with the label - Supper Friday.(can be kept in fridge for 2 days max. but must be eaten by Sunday) There was fresh juice containers, his favorite yogurt, bottled water and a loaf of multi grain bread. He pulled open the freezer section only to find containers labeled, dated and heating instructions on each for dinner every day until next Friday. Now what? 


Brian figured it had to have been Deb. She would know how much he would miss all the things Justin did for him. 


He pulled off his work clothes hung up his suit and was surprised to see the dry cleaning hanging in his closet. He threw his dirty clothes in the hamper and grabbed a towel and went into the shower never noticing that the laundry had been done and the towels shelf full again when it had been empty that morning. 


Week two: 


Brian had been too busy at work this past two weeks to have time for much of anything. He hadn't been to Woodies or Babylon, preferring to stay at home and relax in the evenings or work on what he'd brought home from the office. He mentally sent a prayer of thanks to Deb each night as he heated up his dinner or grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge. Tonight, being Friday he knew he'd now have to face the grocery store but when he opened the fridge it had been filled again and supper was an interesting spinach salad. Thank you Deb. These little gifts meant he could stay away from the diner and all the questions the peanut gallery would ask. And he could stay away from Justin. He did his best to not think about him all the time but it wasn't easy. 


Tonight when he walked over to his computer desk he noticed some cheques on his account paper clipped to envelopes he sat down and automatically signed them, phone, hydro, mortgage payment, grocery store, cleaning lady. He signed them all putting them into their stamped and addressed envelopes set them to one side and began working on tonight's project. Never giving a thought as to why they would be ready for him. 


Week three: 


Brian climbed into bed and felt under the pillow for Justin's sweatshirt. He'd found it behind the hamper the morning of the Rage fiasco and hid it under the pillow. He knew he'd need something of Justin's to help him sleep. One of these days he'd look up on the internet about familiar and comforting smells and why they offered peace and comfort. He shut his eyes not noticing the red sweatshirt had been replaced with a blue one. He rolled onto his side cuddling the shirt and breathing the scent of Justin relaxing slowly into a deep sleep. 


Saturday morning Brian was getting dressed pulling on his favorite black shirt not remembering that he thrown it in the hamper two days before and taking it off a hanger in his closet right now. He went into the kitchen and grabbed a coffee from the coffee maker that turned on automatically each morning brewing coffee and storing it in the thermos carafe that had replaced the glass pot. Coffee had been ready each morning for him the whole time Justin lived in the loft and Brian reached for it each morning and it continued to be there. Freshly brewed, hot and strong. He opened the fridge and pulled out an English muffin popping it in the toaster. The empty peanut butter jar had been replaced with a jar of almond butter this week, Brian smiled appreciatively as he applied the almond butter to his muffin. He took his muffin and coffee to the computer. Signed this week's cheques putting them at the back of the table where he'd placed last weeks and forgotten them not noticing that last week's cheques had disappeared. 


Brian was immersed in his work when the phone rang. "Hey" 


"Brian, it's Deb, I love you like a son you little asshole, but why send me flowers? They are the nicest flowers I've ever seen." 


"Deb, the flowers were thank you for everything you've done the past few weeks since Justin moved out." 


"Brian, honey, I haven't really done anything special." 


"It was special to me." 


"Brian, I've been home with a sprained ankle for the last week and the week before that I was visiting my sister." 


"Oh, well the flowers are for all the nice things you do throughout the year." 


"Thanks honey, you come on over soon, Vic and I miss you. Sunshine moved out this morning, he's renting Ted's spare room." 


"I didn't know he was with you guys, I thought he....." 


"Brian, Justin was here sleeping in his old bed by the time Vic and I got home after the party. I thought you knew that, he'd moved in the afternoon of the party. We figured you two had split before the Rage thing." 


"He moved in the afternoon of the party? But I ......" 


"Sunshine said you needed your space, something about one of you needing to grow up. That wouldn't have been you would it?" she chuckled. 


"What about the banjo player?" 


"Ethan, such a nice young man. He comes in and visits with Justin once and awhile. I think the two of them will be good friends. They have lots in common. But Brian, Justin loves you, he likes Ethan the same as he does Emmett and Ted, as a friend." 


Brian was finally able to hang up after promising to visit. He sat there puzzled about what Deb had told him. Justin living at Ted's? What happened to the hearts and flowers and sweet nothings whispered in his ear by the banjo player? 


He put the thoughts out of his mind and went back to his project. 


Week four: 


Friday had been one of those days, he'd spilled his fresh coffee on his pants and it was only as he changed into another suit did he realize that he couldn't have fresh hot coffee each morning because he never figured out how to use the timer on Justin's fancy machine. Yet his burnt leg and soggy pants said otherwise. He couldn't believe that he'd had coffee every morning for the past four weeks not even thinking about where in hell it came from. At work there was a note on his desk reminding him of his dental appointment that afternoon. He was looking at it when his phone rang. "Brian here," 


"Brian, it's Cynthia, sorry, but I'm going to be late, my car won't start and the Auto Club is running late." 


"That's fine Cynthia, you must have remembered my dentist appointment last night. Glad you left me the note, I'd forgotten about it completely." 


"Brian, I left before you last night, and what dental appointment?" 


"Don't worry about, see you when you get here." Brian hung up staring at the note, turning it over and over looking for a clue. 


He walked into the loft, tenderly holding one hand against his mouth. The work on the new crown hurt like a son of a bitch. There was a note on the counter and a small envelope. He opened it and shook out two white tablets and then looked at the note. "Brian, if your mouth is hurting, take these ibuprofen, they'll help stop the inflammation of the gums around the tooth the dentist worked on. Heat the soup for one and half minutes in the micro, it won't be too hot, but better than chewing on a salad tonight. The shake in the fridge is more a smoothy kind of thing and will fill you up with the soup. You'll be ok by tomorrow." 


Brian walked over to the fridge, sure enough his supper was waiting and the fridge was stocked again. He went over to the computer, yep this weeks expenses had been looked after waiting for his signature. Now Brian, who had always considered himself smarter than the average bear, was beginning to smell a blonde rat. He checked out the bedroom closet, noted the dry cleaning, the fresh sheets, he pulled up his pillow, grey sweatshirt in place of the red one of last week, clean towels, new toothpaste, supply of TP, yep, a blonde rat. He was realizing just exactly why Justin's absence hadn't been as bad as he had thought it would be. Brian had been so busy at work, so involved with being 'super partner' in order to keep thoughts of Justin to a minimum he'd let his life continue never noting that his home life had been smoothly running along. When Debbie had denied any part in his smoothly run life, he figured Lindsey had taken him on. Even Lindsey wouldn't have been able to manage the sweatshirt pillow change. 


Week five: 


Brian got up drank his coffee, went down to the Jeep and moved it two blocks behind the loft. He walked back and went up the stairs prepared to wait for his blonde rat. He was sitting in the chaise waiting when he heard the elevator. A phone rang as the loft door was being pulled open. "Hey, Daphne, what's up?" Justin was juggling the phone and some grocery bags along with a dry cleaning bag. He put the bags down on the counter never noticing Brian sitting quietly on the chaise. "Yeah, I'm here now, I'm going to put the stuff away in the fridge, get the laundry and dry cleaning. I'll meet you at the laundry mat in about half an hour." He paused listening on the other end. 


"I've told you why Daphne. Brian's starting this new partnership thing, he's overloaded at work. If I didn't have his dinner ready for him he'd never eat. He's too thin now." 


"I know he's a big boy" Justin chuckled "I didn't mean that kind of big Daphne. Brian's kind of complicated, he's like this thirty one year old kid. Look at the Rage thing, I mean how childish was that. I think he forgot my SAT scores. Like I was supposed to suck it all in and run crying to Ethan, the big bad Brian having proven his point. To quote the great Kinney, -- "Twat". He might as well have given me an engagement ring and published the bans." Justin listened. 


"Because the Rage thing said "I LOVE YOU" louder than anything else he could have done." Justin laughed at something Daphne said. 


"I know this, because I've spent the last two years learning to speak Kinneyese." Justin listened he was almost finished putting things away in the kitchen. "It really doesn't matter Daphne, if it's one month or a thousand months, I'll wait for him to grow up. It's bound to happen eventually. Of course we may be two toothless fags playing hide and seek like we're doing now." 


"Wouldn't matter, we'd get it up even if we were ancient" 


"He'll never notice, Brian's in a rut, as long as his clothes are clean, towels for his showers are at hand and something to drink and eat he'll just keep on trucking." 


"No, that was Trucking any way, I love the big jerk, always have, always will, he can be the impossible Kinney all he wants, it won't ever change how I feel." Justin turned and came face to face with Brian, standing by the chaise, his hands on his hips, his face purple. "Oops, gotta go Daphne, don't wait for me, I could be a long while" 


"What the fuck have you been doing?" 


"Think I mentioned it once before Brian, killing you with kindness." 


"Why?" 


"I love you and you love me" 


"I've never said it" 


"You've said it in words every time you cum with me right from the start. You've said it in actions with every day we've known each other. I'm sorry I temporarily forgot to listen. I'll never forget to listen again." 


"Twat? Kid?" 


"I said it with love if that counts. Now come here you big jerk let Justin see how much you've grown" Justin beamed at Brian and held out his arms. Brian hesitated for less than a fraction of a second before he was wrapped in Justin's arms enjoying the feeling of a child who had returned home after a long time away.