Sealed with a KisS - 3 - This one is for Lois – (hugs to you) Disclaimer: I’ve plunged the boys into another AU – I wasn’t going to -- I tried to go cold turkey and ignore them – but the voices in my head insisted on this one. I make no money from this and I’ll send them back to Cowlip when I’m done. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Brian stood on the patio balcony looking out over the sea. The sun was about to sink out of sight and the colors were spectacular, though the tall man didn’t notice. The events of the last forty eight hours had wrung every bit of emotion out of him to the point he thought he’d probably blow away in a strong breeze, he was wrung so dry. He was about to find a deck chair when a small hand slipped into his right hand, soon joined by another hand slipping into his left one. He looked down first at Mikey, and then at Stephi, a tear rolled down Stephi’s cheek and like some magic mirror, one rolled down Mikey’s cheek. Brian felt his own eyes grow tight with unshed tears. He looked at the boys. “Hey guys, how you holding up?” he asked. “Daddy Brian,” Mikey began “Can you make our poppa come out of momma’s room? The men from the funeral place want to take her to the Church and poppa won’t open the door.” “He won’t?” Brian had left Justin alone for the past hour, but he’d thought that Justin had been settled in his mind about what was happening next. “I’ll see what I can do. You boys find Grandma Jen, or Grandma Debbie and have them deal with the men who are waiting.” He bent down and kissed their tears away before going in search of Justin. Brian didn’t bother with the locked door, but rather climbed over the edge of the balcony and walked in through the open French doors. Angelina lay on the large bed. Her hair carefully arranged around her, her pillows covered with sprays of flowers from the gardens. Justin sat in a chair in the corner of the room, his blank eyes staring at his dead wife, tears silently rolling down his face. “You have to let her go Baby” Brian said softly. “You’re worrying your boys.” “The day I met her, we had this amazing connection. It was like we were an extension of one another. It didn’t matter that I was gay, it was different. I was still grieving over you and she knew it right away. She made me laugh that night and it was then I realized I hadn’t laughed since, since that day you were helping me by throwing the ball at my mother’s. I worked for her grandmother, her father had brought me to meet the old lady almost a year before that, she’d needed a secretary of sorts and he thought it would be a good job for me. When Angel and I met, my life began again. Sure I still cried at night when I missed you and I still ached inside, but my Angel could bring a smile to my lips and she made my heart glad. I was learning to paint again by then and she helped and encouraged me. She made me begin therapy again and took me to specialists. She cared.” He sighed and wiped his hands across his eyes. “I knew something was wrong for a long time before I could convince her to go to the doctor and I was so mad at the world and at her when I found out that she knew this disease could find her and kill her and she never told me. I felt betray and lied to somehow, but when I looked in at her brown eyes, filled with fear, all I could do was hold her and try to make it better. Like you used to do for me. That night, she crept into my room and into my bed, it happened often, though all we both sought was the comfort of another body close by to keep the night demons at bay. This night was different. This night we’d had her death sentence confirmed and “Justin paused to regain control of himself “I don’t know why we did it, you know I’m gay and I know it too and so did Angelina, but it happened. Only that one time, but it was enough and the boys were started.” Brian walked over to him and sat on the floor by Justin’s feet. He lay his head in the blonde’s lap and Justin continued his story, only now he let his nervous fingers comb through the silky auburn hair, the quiet touch bringing comfort to them both. “We were together ever since. She never once slept alone again except the night before our wedding. Everyone thought we had such a wonderful marriage, but it was a sham, two friends, more brother and sister than lovers, but we did love one another and she hated to be alone in the dark.” His breath became ragged. “I can’t do it, I can’t let her go and be alone for all eternity. They want to put her in a box and put her in the ground and she’ll be all alone.” He started to sob and Brian pulled him down on the floor with him and wrapped his arms around him and together they cried for the girl who lay in the large bed all alone. Finally when the worst was over, Brian said. “What you see over there on the bed isn’t your Angel; it’s only the body she wore while she was here on earth. You know that Sunshine. Angel is with her family in heaven or wherever one goes when their time is up. She loved you and the boys enough to find me and the rest of the family. She loved you enough to last as long as she did, you have to celebrate that. You have to learn to laugh and do all of the things she’d want you to do.” He kissed Justin’s forehead. “Angel will never be alone, because she’s in your heart and in your son’s hearts. When you look at those boys you can see her in their eyes. She’ll never be alone Justin, she’s just in a different location. Brian stood up and helped Justin to stand. “Say one more goodbye and I’ll take you to my room. Your mother and Deb will see to it that Angel’s body is treated kindly by the funeral parlor guys.” ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ The Cathedral where Justin and Angelina were married was filled to capacity to say goodbye to her. Justin sat in the front pew with the twins and Brian and Gus and his mother and Molly. Debbie, Vic, Michael, Ben, Emmett and Ted and Lindsay and Melanie sat in the row behind them. The service wasn’t long but it was very emotional, for the passing of a young mother is never easy. The boys were quiet, their eyes sad, but no tears were shed because they’d promised their mother that they would think happy thoughts because now she was able to run and dance with all the other Angels. Brian rode with Justin and the boys to the cemetery. Justin and Angelina had chosen this spot together before the boys had even been born, when the likelihood of it being used seemed so far away. Today Justin was grateful it was one thing he didn’t have to do. The few prayers that were said by the priest were over quickly. As they all began to drift away, leaving the lonely white coffin in the arid soil, fake grass hiding the dirt that soon would cover the lid, Justin choked back the urge to scream. “Poppa, poppa.” Stephano said. He pulled on Justin’s suit jacket. “Look it’s momma and she’s dancing.” Brian and Justin followed where both boys were pointing. Whether it was trick of the afternoon sunlight on the meadow of spring flowers that covered the hill, or whether it really was Angel dancing, they would never know, but in the distance, the sun behind blocking a clear view, someone, with long dark curls that reached her waist, dressed in a flowing white cotton gown, was whirling and dancing, dipping and running, and the heavy smell of jasmine, Angel’s favorite scent, drifted over the four of them standing among the gravestones mesmerized at the sight, until a cloud passing over the sun, hid the ethereal site in the shadows. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Justin sat in the garden partially hidden by an old bent olive tree. With the windows and doors opened wide to the warm breezes, he could hear the sounds of everyone talking inside the house. His mother and Debbie had taken over the kitchen and with Vic and Emmett’s help had the funeral reception well in hand. Gus and Molly were never far from the boys and made sure that they were looked after. Lindsay and Melanie were moving from room to room investigating the layout of the house and looking at his paintings. Ted he knew, was still in his office on the internet doing gawd knows what. Brian, he wondered where Brian had disappeared to. He thought fleetingly that perhaps the tall man had stumbled into one of the few gay men on this small island and was relieving his tension. But he quickly dismissed the idea as too bad even for Brian. No – Brian was probably with Michael and Ben. “Hey Justin” it was Michael. He’d found him. “Look, we didn’t get a chance to talk before with everything that’s happened and all.” Michael paused. “I want you to know that I’m sorry for your loss. I know how the last few years must have been for you.” And Justin realized that of all the people there today, Michael did know how he felt because of Ben. He’d read Ben’s book a few years ago and knew that he was positive. “Yeah, it sucks doesn’t it?” Justin said his voice low and without emotion. “I thought it would get better you know, I mean Angel and I talked about it all the time, how things would be. I knew it would hurt, but never this much.” “I hurts watching everyone else living without complications doesn’t it?” Michael sat on the ground beside Justin, and leaned his back against the tree. “You see some bastard on the news that should be shot and pissed on, yet he’s standing there alive and well while someone you love is dying and it fucking makes you want to scream.” “It’s worse than the ‘what if’ game that I used to play when I was with Brian.” Justin said, his voice a little more animated. “You know the game, ‘cause I bet you used to play it too. What if I did this or that, then Brian would love me. Or if I said something differently, or got better grades, or painted his picture just right, then maybe he’d love me.” “You’ve got that right, I used to play that game about Brian until one day I looked at him and realized that unless I could morph into you, he was never going to love me the way he loves you.” Michael sighed. “Now I do it with Ben. What if I’m extra good with him, will his T cells show better numbers. If I walk a certain way, or talk a certain way, will it make him live longer?” “The funny thing is Michael, I know better and you know better, but we still do it. I spent the last year making bigger and better bargains with the gods, with anything, just to have her day a bit better, maybe so she would have the strength to sit in the garden for an hour or so, or not fall asleep when the children were telling her about their day.” “I’d hold her in my arms each night - terrified to fall asleep thinking that if she stopped breathing I could somehow wake her up and make her breathe again. I was making myself sick, and then all of a sudden I began to fall asleep, sometimes before her.” He looked at Michael and laughed. “The brat was slipping half of her sleeping pill into our bedtime coco, she was making me rest not caring that she wasn’t getting enough for her own full time sleep.” He half laughed. “She was pretty good too; it took me almost a month to figure out what was happening” Michael laughed a bit. “Your Angelina sounds like quite a woman. I wish I could have met her.” “I wish that too Michael. That’s another one of my regrets that I’ll have to live with. I should never have stayed away from my family in Pittsburgh. Angel used to nag at me all the time to write or telephone. I think she swiped Brian’s business card out of my wallet, that’s how she found out his address to send the parcel and letter. One day I’ll have a little chat with the boys about that because she has been bedridden for the past 3 months. In order to reach out to Brian, she had to have had help.” “Don’t be too hard on my namesake.” Michael said. “I still can’t believe you named him after me.” “You understood what I was going through Michael, even if it hurt you. You didn’t hesitate to help me when I asked and you are a good friend to the man I love. I knew you’d look after him. When Mikey was born and he looked up at me with his brown eyes, I had no choice; he was Michael, though truthfully Angelina and I had decided that if we had a child that child would be called Michael or Michelle. Who knew we’d have two of them all at once.” “I hope you’ll let me and Ben be part of their lives now.” Michael was hesitant in saying the words, but he’d fallen in love with both of the boys the minute he’d met them. Justin laughed, “Can you just imagine me trying to stop them? They are little terrors when they want something. Their mother has given them something I was too selfish to give, a family and it’s a large family that they’ve been craving. All of their friends come from these big Greek families and it was only the four of us, they always felt that something was missing from their lives.” “Can I ask a favor of you?” “Sure.” “Could you go see Brian, he’s holed up in that fancy room the boys found for him up in the tower, he says he has a headache, but I’m not sure that’s what’s bothering him.” He looked at Justin. “Why does your house have a tower – it reminds me of a castle, some place to keep a princess.” “It was Angelina’s mother’s room years ago, though she died before she ever got to use it and Tomas, her husband couldn’t bear to use it, so it’s just stayed empty. It has an amazing view, especially at night.” He smiled at thought of Brian being a drama princess and hiding out in the many windowed room. “It was never all that practical, because of all the stairs to reach it. The boys wanted it for Brian, because they have always called him their Prince. They have been sure he’d come and take us all away for a long time. I think their mother had something to do with those ideas, though I never caught them talking about it. Did you get a chance to look at the room? The bathroom is especially nice because from this angle the tower looks to stand solitary against the cliffs, but really, the doors that open from the other side open into a private walled garden that can only be reached from the pretend tower, or if you know where the secret door is in the one wall. The bathroom is partially open to the elements, though very private, lots of marble and old statues.” “Considering that Brian didn’t let me put my toe in the door, no I didn’t get to see it.” Michael laughed. “Maybe you should go and rescue your drama Prince.” “How has he been Michael, honestly?” Justin stood up and dusted off the back of his pants. He held out his hand to give Michael a boost up. “He’s been good Justin. He went through a bad patch for a few months when you were first gone. But somehow he and your mother came together and I think they helped support one another emotionally ever since. I know it’s softened him a bit. He’s been good with Gus. It was Gus who found the magazine spread of this place. You’ve been a romantic mystery to him when he was growing up. You were the reason his father was a kind of lone wolf.” Justin started in the direction of the house and then turned back. “Michael, thanks for coming out here and talking to me.” He sighed. “I guess I was having my own drama princess moment and thinking I was the only one in the world who’d ever felt this kind of anguish. You put it in perspective for me and for that I’m grateful. I wish you and Ben a long and happy life time.” It took him almost an hour to make his way to the stairway that was hidden on the second floor. Everyone had to offer their condolences. Finally Justin was able to slip up the stairs. He stood for a moment in front of the large door, he tried the handle and it was locked of course. Justin reached up and pulled a concealed key off the top of the door molding. The boys had locked themselves in this room one too many times and Justin had finally had the key moved to where he could locate it quickly. Justin unlocked the door and stepped inside the room. The evening shadows were creeping in and he resisted the urge to flick on the light. Instead he turned and locked the door behind him. He walked quietly over to the bed, unsure of whether Brian was asleep or not. He stood beside the high bed and looked at the man he’d loved for all these years. Really looked at him, memorizing each new line and wrinkle, he took a deep breath and inhaled Brian’s spicy cologne. Slowly, as to not disturb him, Justin removed his clothing, every stitch, until he was completely naked in the warmth left by the summer sun. He lifted the blankets and slipped between the rich cotton of the sheets and he wasn’t surprised when - still sleeping - Brian lifted his arm for Justin to snuggle close like he used to do so many years ago, the arm hugging him tight. His eyes shut, his ear pressed against Brian’s chest and he listened to the rhythmic beat of the kind heart and the gentle swish of his breathing. He could smell the slightly musky smell of clean sweat and his cock was hard in an instant. The years fell away and Justin could almost hear the Pittsburgh traffic outside the loft windows or see the glow the blue neon lights left on all the surfaces. Brian rolled over in his sleep and pulled Justin too him even tighter. Both strong arms were now holding the smaller man. The touch of Brian’s body laying full length against his was full of reminiscences of what they’d had once before and Justin could have laughed out loud for the pleasure and happiness of the memories they evoked. Unable to resist any longer, Justin wiggled until he could reach Brian’s lips. He let the lost years flow through his lips in the kiss he began. He was the Prince waking up his Sleeping Beauty. Brian’s hazel eyes opened and then shut as the passion of Justin’s kiss began to take over his soul until all he could do was moan in pleasure. When Justin finally released him Brian gasped. “Justin, are you sure about this, because I have a very small window of stopping here?” Justin answered him with another kiss, this time his tongue reached every crevice, returning to familiar territory and rejoicing. “Geeze Justin, it’s been too long. If you don’t stop I’m going to cum like a virgin bride.” And Justin giggled at the analogy and moved his lips down Brian’s chest, tasting the essence of Brian Kinney with his tongue and his teeth and his lips. “You think you’ve had a long wait Brian.” Justin whispered, “you try waiting as long as I have.” His words became lost as Brian’s engorged cock was sucked down Justin’s throat and with a roar Brian lost himself in an orgasm, the likes of which he hadn’t had since he was a teenager. Feeling Justin’s throat swallowing his cum made the waves of orgasmic pleasure even more intense. Justin moved back up the lean torso and once again resumed his kissing. “We have all night.” Justin’s voice was hoarse with emotion. Brian held Justin’s head firmly in place and looked deep into his eyes. “We have a lifetime Sunshine, this is only the beginning.” He rolled Justin over on his back and proceeded to show his young lover what he’d been missing. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ “Shhhhhhh” Brian began to wake up. He didn’t open his eyes, but he could hear giggles coming from the doors that were open to the patio. “Poppa is very beautiful, did you take the picture?” another quiet voice. “Guys, the dads are going to be pissed with you if they find out.” Ahhh, thought Brian the voice of reason. He smiled to himself thinking of Gus trying to get the twins, who were probably as mischievous as their father had been when he was their age, to behave. Gus had no experience with headstrong blonds, well Sonny Boy, welcome to my world. “I need one more picture of poppa, it’s easier to paint with a picture and I would never get him to lay there for me.” Mikey was trying to sound reasonable. “Mikey, poppa looks happy, see he’s smiling, but he doesn’t have his pajamas on.” Stephi observed. “That’s ‘cause they had sex.” Mikey was matter of fact. “Remember Gino and Henry at Alex’s. Remember what we saw on the beach?” “Eeewww, that’s gross,” Stephi said and Gus began to laugh. “It happens guys, you should see what I have to put up with - I live with two mothers’ who are always taking ‘naps’.” Gus held up his hands and made quotation mark signs. “Really, what do they do?” Stephi asked “Don’t you need a penis to have sex?” “Apparently not” Gus said. “I sort of don’t know what they do. I asked once and they said I had to be older. I asked Dad and he said to ask the moms.” “Let’s ask Grandma Debbie” Mikey piped up. “She swears and everything. Momma would be grumpy if she heard her.” He paused for a few minutes. “Do you think she can hear Grandma Debbie in Heaven?” “Gee, I sure hope not.” Stephi said. “If it starts to rain with thunder and lightning, maybe your mom heard her.” Gus offered. “It looks pretty sunny out, so I guess it’s okay.” Mikey said. “Let’s wake up poppa and daddy.” “Stephi, daddy Brian looked like a Prince last night, but now he looks kind of rumpled.” Mikey giggled and soon the other two were giggling. “He has curly hair on his tummy, way more than poppa. “You guys have to be quiet; dad is kind of growly when he wakes up. He needs a whole bunch of coffee before he’s even half way nice. Maybe we should go downstairs.” “Poppa won’t mind.” Brian could hear small feet making their way cautiously to the bed, followed by the heavier tread of Gus. The bed sagged with the weight of the twins and he felt them move up toward the head of the bed. They were bending over Justin’s face when Brian opened his eyes and said “BOO” the two boys fell backwards squealing and laughing. Even Gus who was sitting at the foot of the bed laughed at the looks on their faces. “What the fu—Justin opened his eyes and found himself staring into the laughing eyes of his sons, with Brian’s hazel ones watching the three of them. “You didn’t wear pajamas poppa and neither did daddy. Me and Stephi aren’t going to wear jamas any more. We’re big boys now.” Michael declared. “Gus, help us out here.” Brian said. “Hey, dad, I don’t wear anything to bed either.” “But you’re eleven.” “And your point is?” Gus drawled so much like his father that Justin started to laugh. “He’s got you there Brian.” Justin laughed. He turned to his boys and in an attempt to be stern. “The door was locked. This means that you are to stay out of the room.” “But the garden door was open, so that means that you really wanted us to visit.” Stephano said. “You know poppa, there is a lock on the garden door too.” “We both have children who are too bright for their own good.” Brian stated as he tried to pull up the sheet and cover both of their bodies without calling attention to what he was doing. When he and Justin were fully covered with the sheet Brian allowed himself the luxury of pulling Justin closer to him before he smiled at all the boys who had joined them in the large bed. “Gus, is anyone else up?” Brian asked. “Or is it only you boys who can’t sleep?” “Dad, it’s almost nine o’clock in the morning. We’ve been up for hours.” He smiled wickedly at his father. “Stephi and Mikey knew where you two were and decided to check on the two of you. Just be happy I kept them away this long. I think a new bike would be a good reward, they were all for coming in here four hours ago and from the sounds I heard, you wouldn’t have been too pleased at being interrupted.” “Your old bike is just fine and it’s your job as a unofficial big brother to keep an eye on your younger siblings.” Brian’s tongue in cheek smirk made Justin laugh. “Thanks Gus, we’ll talk about rewards when your father is in the shower.” “I can hear you Sunshine and when I’m in the shower you will be too.” Brian kissed the end of Justin’s nose. “Can we come too?” Stephi asked. “No.” was the quick response from both Brian and Justin. “But poppa – Stephi began only to be interrupted by Gus. “Bro – why don’t you and your brother come with me to the kitchen? We can make some coffee for the dads and find something to eat. I’m starving.” “Grandma Jen said she was going to make cinny buns” Mikey offered. “They sound really yummy.” “They are, she makes the best cinnamon buns ever.” Gus said. “She does boys; it may be a long time since I ate one, but I haven’t forgotten.” “Ask her to put the cream cheese icing on if she can.” Brian added. “I love them like that.” “Brian Kinney eating cinnamon bus with cream cheese icing?” Justin laughed. “I can’t believe I heard you say that.” “Grandma Jen makes them for Dad all the time.” Gus volunteered. “I can always tell when he’s been eating them, ‘cause he’s at the gym everyday for a week once he indulges.” “There’s no gym here.” “I’ll think of some way to work off the calories.” Brian smirked. “See you in an hour boys, we’ll join you in the kitchen. And Gus, lock the garden door on your way out please.” “Why?” Mikey asked. “They want to have sex again stupid” Stephi whispered to his brother, though everyone could hear. “We just want a little privacy boys.” Justin said – his face flushed with embarrassment as he watched the three boys leave the room. “I’ll keep them busy Dad.” Gus assured his father. “See you in an hour.” “Gus, lock the garden door too please.” Justin called out. He looked at Brian and explained. “With my boys you have to remember every detail – they look for loop holes all the time when they want something, which is how they ended up in here this morning. They both knew that a locked door means keep out, but they also figured you or I would forget to shut and lock the French doors.” “I remember another blond Taylor who was always looking for ways to slip inside my ‘walls’. It must be a family trait.” Brian bent his head to capture the still swollen lips of his lover. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ “Hello boys.” Emmett said. He had a frilly apron tied around his waist and was busy stirring something in a large earthenware bowl. “Vic is teaching me how to bake his famous Snicker doodle cookies, do you want to help?” “I’ll pass Auntie Em,” Gus said, but scooped a finger full of cookie dough and quickly popped it in his mouth. “Not bad.” He grinned. “You eat raw cookie dough?” Stephi asked with wide round eyes. “Not if I can keep it away from him Sugar.” Emmett said. “Gus Kinney, you know better.” He tried to sound angry but they all knew it was just a ruse. “We came to make poppa some coffee and some for daddy B too.” Mikey offered. He looked at the coffee maker and saw that it was full. “Daddy B – I like that” Michael said with a laugh. He looked at Ben. “What you think big guy?” “I think it’s rather nice.” Ben smiled at the boys who smiled shyly back at him. “We’ll make some fresh coffee for Brian and Justin when they come down. I expect if you three just woke them up, it could be awhile before we see them.” “Yeah,” Gus agreed. “Dad said to give them an hour.” He sat down at the big table. “Where are the Grams and Molly, we’re hungry again and were hoping for something yummy.” “There’s no rule that says the women have to do all the work in the kitchen Gus, you know that. If you’re hungry look in the fridge and find something to eat.” “The women headed down to the village to check out the shops.” Vic said from his perch by the oven. “Poppa says that when he was a boy his momma made him lots of good things to eat. Our momma didn’t make stuff, but our poppa did.” Stephi was watching Emmett with interest. “What smells so good?” Mikey asked. “It’s the cinnamon rolls, they’re almost ready” Michael volunteered. He looked at his watch, “Five more minutes.” “Daddy B wants cream cheese icing on his.” Hearing those words the adults laughed. Brian had a notorious sweet tooth that he kept well in control and hidden, but all of his friends were on to him about it. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ When the thunk of the heavy garden door sounded, Brian and Justin knew they were alone. Brian turned to Justin and smoothed his fine silky blond hair back from his forehead, then gathered him in a close hug. Justin all but purred, he was so content. “How are you doing this morning Sunshine?” Brian asked, concerned that things were moving too fast between them. Angelina’s funeral had only been the day before. “It seems strange to not wake up and check that Angel is still breathing. To get her ready for the day, everything cleaned up from her night. She was fully bedridden for almost three months Brian and there’s a lot involved with that. We talked about this a lot. About what it would be like when she was finally gone. She wanted me to find you right away. She wanted me to find you before, but she settled for my promise of looking for you once she’d died. It was a promise I wasn’t sure I’d be able to keep. I was sure that you had moved on with your life and you wouldn’t want an old --- he hesitated over the word. “Boyfriend’ Brian provided. “Whatever, “ Justin said. “I didn’t think you needed me to be whining around you looking for sympathy. And then there are the boys. This is their home. It’s all that they’ve ever known. How can I uproot them and fly them off to Pittsburgh to maybe a lukewarm reception. No, I don’t think I would have kept the promise. At least not right away.” “And now, now that you’ve found me, or I’ve found you?” “Another dilemma, you and the family fly over here and support me when I’ve been a complete shit. I’m waffling between being incredibly pleased to see everyone - to racked with guilt for it taking Angelina’s death to bring us together.” Justin sighed. “And then there’s you; Brian I’m no longer the eighteen year old basket case newly released from the hospital. I’m a man, a widower, with two small boys. I have responsibilities here in Greece with the estates from Madam, Tomas and now Angelina.” Justin turned away to look out the window. “Last night was amazing and wonderful and everything I ever dreamed it would be and then some. But soon you and the rest of the family will be heading back to Pittsburgh and our life will resume here. Stephano and Michael will go back to school and me ----- his voice trailed off. “I really don’t know what I’ll be doing, my life has been looking after Angelina and the boys.” Justin’s head drooped in dejection and he was silent. “Do you love me? I mean love me like you used to.” Brian asked his voice quiet. “Brian, to be honest, no – not like I used to – the love I had for you then was more hero worship than love, though I did love you. You were my first” he gave a huff of a laugh “And darn near my only.” Justin could feel Brian stiffen at his words. “When I left, I left before we could both give our love a chance to grow, to mature like real love does. I never forgot you, I always dreamed of you and yes I continued to love you like I did all those years ago. But I want more. I want to have a love that transcends all others. I want you to love me no matter what happens in our lives and I want to love you the same way.” He looked at Brian, “Does any of what I’m saying make any kind of sense? You and I are amazing together in bed; you and I fit perfectly when you hold me in your arms. I know when you walk into a room; we have that kind of connection. But I want a stable relationship not only for my sake, but for the sake of the boys. I want them to have a normal childhood; they’ve had only a tiny piece of one. I want them to know joy and happiness, to have us go to school plays and go on picnics, all the things that we’ve never been able to do because their mother was ill.” “Justin, what I feel for you, what I’ve always felt, is love. I want the same things in a relationship. I really believe that you and I, we could have that. There’s a connection between us that’s always been there and now we have the opportunity to allow it to grow.” Brian turned until he was sitting facing Justin. He reached out and cupped Justin’s chin in his hand and held his face in place so that they could look deep into each other’s eyes. “Justin Taylor, I want to grow old with you. I want your boys to be our boys. I’ve waited a long time to find you again. I’m not letting you go easily, so be warned.” “What about your job, your career. You can’t take time off and visit us. I know how much your job means to you.” “You told me you were wealthy.” Brian stated. “I think that having spent most of my life busting my balls to get ahead, it’s time to find myself a partner who can afford to keep those balls in the style they’ve grown used to.” He looked around. “I rather fancy myself as a well paid house boy living in Greece.” “Boy?” Justin teased. “You are only as young as you feel.” Brian quipped. “So you’re telling me you are staying?” “Not only am I staying Sunshine, but I rather like this room. I could get used to it quite nicely.” Justin beamed at him. “I don’t know what to think.” “I’d suggest we take this show into the shower or we’ll have two blond little brats banging on the door soon.” Brian pulled himself out of the bed reluctantly and held out his hand for Justin. “I wouldn’t mind seeing if your memory includes what to do in the shower together.” “You’re the old man with the faulty memory, not me.” Justin quipped and headed for the shower, Brian following close behind. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ “Justin, you look good. Are you feeling alright?” his mother asked as he walked into the busy kitchen that appeared to be the hub of the family activities for the day. “Hi mom, I’m fine. Angel and I had years to say goodbye, it’s just a shock when it really happens.” Justin kissed her cheek. “Mikey, Stephi, have you been good for Emmett?” “Auntie Em, poppa, Gus calls him that and he said we could too.” Stephi corrected him. Mikey was at the kitchen table, a sketchpad in front of him, his head bent concentrating on his latest masterpiece. Brian walked into the room next and stood next to Justin, his arm draped casually over Justin’s shoulder in the long familiar way he’d always had with Justin, showing the world that Justin was his. Michael rolled his eyes at Ted who was sitting at the table with Ben playing chess. “What’s a guy got to do to get a coffee around here” Brian snerked at them. “You already did it big guy.” Vic said and handed him a large mug of freshly brewed coffee. “Seeing as all of you are here, I want to thank you for coming. You guys completely blew me away, but it sure was nice.” Someone started to speak and Brian laced his fingers through Justin’s hand while he drank his coffee. “Now that you are all here, I want you to spend some time exploring the island, go over to Athens, and have some fun.” He grinned up at Brian. “Angelina would have wanted your first experience here in her homeland to be a positive one.” He looked at his boys “Isn’t that right boys?” he asked them and smiled when they both nodded their heads. “What about you and Brian?” Ted asked. “Are the two of you heading to Athens?” “Not this time. Brian and I have a lot of catching up to do, we need time to get to know one another and Gus and his little brothers need the time as well.” “Justin, Brian, does this mean?” his mother began. “Jennifer, let Justin and I work it out by ourselves. We both know what we want. I have to see whether I can put up with his irritating ways.” He flinched when Justin punched his arm. “And Justin has to get used to the new and improved Brian Kinney.” Brian looked at the three children seated at the table. “And we need to give the children time.” “Dad, Stephi and Mikey are excited about seeing snow in Pittsburgh. You and Justin could buy a house big enough for all of us and I could visit all the time, and you know, show them the ropes.” “Poppa, Gus told us all about the school he goes to and he said that we could go there too and he’d look after us.” “Were you guys going to include Gus’ moms and Brian and I in these plans?” Justin teased. “Of course poppa. We love you and we know that you and daddy B would want us to be happy.” Mikey batted his eyes at the two adults. Brian laughed out loud. “I don’t know if having you and two smaller versions around, is a big plus for my old age.” “You know you love it old man.” Justin said. “You know, you could be right.” Brian kissed Justin passionately. “Gross, kissing,” Stephi said. But everyone else smiled to themselves. It was a long time happening, but it was wonderful seeing both Brian and Justin so happy.