Reviewer: Cheryl (Anonymous) · Date: January 21, 2011 10:30 PM · On: Chapter 1

This is a good idea, but I think you need to expand it a bit.  Why the fight night was being held - what program at the GLC was going to benefit.  Maybe include other fighters in your narrative.  Were the fighters that the volunteers were going against professionals?  Why did the guy fighting against Justin get so intense?  Grudge maybe?

So I'd like to see more detail included, but good start.